Top 10 Political Valentine Card Messages
10. To Lance Corporal Daniel Smith
From New Bilibid Prisons Inmates
Roses are red
Violets are blue
We’re so excited
Can’t wait for you.
9. To The Senate
From Jocjoc Bolante
How do I lie thee?
Let me count the ways.
8. To the Three Alabang Boys
From PDEA Director Dionisio Santiago
O, drug dealers na makapangyarihan
Sampung prosecutors ang nasasaklawan
Kapag pumasok kayo saan mang kulungan
Susuhulan lahat lumaya ka lamang.
7. To DOJ Prosecutor John Resado
From The Alabang Boys
Thank you for tryin’
we appreciate it
Just return our money
or get mired in deep shit.
6. To All German Nationals in the Philippines
From Sen. Lito Lapid with Love on Valentine’s Day
Penpen de sarapen
De kutsilyo de almasen
Haw haw de carabao
De van hauten.
5. To Loren
From Your ex, Tony Leviste
All alone in my cell, I think of you my darling
Will you visit me today for an hour of canoodling?
I’ve got a bed, two soft pillows, and a tv set to boot
I vow to be gentle, I promise not to shoot!
4. To Ping and Jamby
From Manny Villar
On Valentine’s Day I forgive, I forget
Just stop the big fuss about the C-5 budget
Double insertion? Did you say I’m guilty?
My wife’s a billionaire so that’s a baloney!
3. To Korina
From Mar Roxas
Thanks for the support oh my dearest one
Next year, I promise, we’ll be in Malacañang
“First Lady” of the land, isn’t that what you wanted?
And I, your President, ‘tang ina, I’m excited!
2. To The World Bank and the Senate
From First Gentleman Mike Arroyo
On this day of hearts, I appeal to thee
My heart is so weak, so please have some mercy
Hearsay! Malicious! The reports are baseless
Even if you ask Merceditas Gutierrez!
And the No. 1 Political Valentine Card Message…
1. To President Arroyo
From US President Barack Obama
I really am sorry for ignoring you dear
I just don’t feel comfy whenever you’re near
My target is to make the U.S.A. better
While your only goal is to change a Charter!
Another New York Plane Crash
A Continental Express plane with 48 people aboard crashed into a Buffalo home in upstate New York. But here’s a more shocking revelation. Unknown to everyone, during US President Barack Obama’s inauguration, a commercial plane ran out of gas while flying over Washington DC. Luckily, the pilot safely landed the aircraft… on Aretha Franklin’s hat.
Paule in Pasay
Remember businessman Jaime Paule? The alleged bagman in the P728M fertilizer fund scam who was ordered arrested by the Senate at the St. Luke’s Medical Center is now detained at the Pasay City jail. Isn’t that a double whammy? Makukulong ka na nga lang sa Pasay City Jail pa! And did you see the detention cell? That’s not a jail man. That’s a cage!
Australian authorities have arrested an arson suspect responsible for the wildfires that have so far killed 181 people and left thousands homeless. Nope, there’s no truth to rumors that the suspect was arrested at the St. Luke’s Medical Center.
Check out the fascinating story about a boy who fathered a child at 13.
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“Minamalat na naman ang puso ko. Pa’no kasi, laging isinisigaw ang pangalan mo.”
~Filipino Pick-up Line