QUIZTION!

5 08 2011

Quarterly Quiz
Test your knowledge of current events. No Googling please! Don’t cheat. Politicians hate competition. Good luck!

1: “If it’s a fight he wants, a fight he will get.” Sino ang nagbitiw ng linyang ito earlier this week?
A: Sen. Tito Sotto to Sen. Kiko Pangilinan kaugnay ng 2004 election fraud
B: Albay Gov. Joey Salceda to DOST Sec. Graciano Yumul matapos panindigan ng PAGASA na tama ang weather forecast nila sa Albay
C: Twitter War II: Patutsada ni Zambales Rep. Mitos Magsaysay, a staunch-Arroyo ally kay Sec. Ricky Carandang
D: Former First Gentleman Mike Arroyo to Sen. Panfilo Lacson matapos ibunyag ng senador ang umano’y maanomalyang bentahan ng helicopter sa PNP

2: Malacañang defended President Aquino’s recent appointment of Lt. Gen. Gaudencio Pangilinan as new director of the Bureau of Corrections. Si Pangilinan ay nahaharap sa kasong pandarambong o plunder. Ano ang depensa ni palace spokesman Atty. Edwin Lacierda?
A: “It’s the president’s prerogative to appoint people that he trusts.”
B: “Kung inyong mapapansin, mga miyembro lang naman ng oposisyon ang nag-iingay laban sa appointment ni General Pangilinan.”
C: “He is presumed innocent until proven guilty.”
D: “Eh ‘di magsumbong kayo sa lolo n’yong panot.”

3: Sino ang pinakamataas ng pinuno ng Commission on Higher Education o CHEd?
A: Weh? May CHEd pa pala?!? ‘Di nga?!?
B: Atty. Julito Vitriolo
C: Seryosong tanong ba ‘yan? May CHEd pa ba talaga?
D: Dr. Patricia Licuanan

4: “Kasi tingnan mo o, who will tell me? Who will tell me? Really! Did you guys even tell me? Wala eh. Nobody even stopped. Nobody informed. It’s like people were waiting for somebody to just do that. Bakit ako? ‘Di ba? Dapat i-inform, i-inform! I should have been informed, ‘yun lang ‘yun!” Sino ang nagsabi nito?
A: Malay ko! We don’t have people like that in our school. Go Ateneo! One Big Fight!
B: Ayokong sagutin! Eh kung maakusahan ako ng bullying?
C: I don’t know! Nobody informed me who that is.
D: Isa lang ang masasabi ko. Mananalo ang UP against UST on Sunday! Let’s go UP!

5: Sa kanyang State of the Nation Address, nabanggit ni Pangulong Aquino ang pangalang “Ginang Escasa.” Sino siya?
A: Dating OFW na umuwi, nagnegosyo, at nagtagumpay
B: Dati niyang teacher
C: Dating Pagcor employee turned whistleblower (P1-B coffee)
D: Dati niyang crush na nag-asawa na

6: Kung hahanapin mo ang babaeng nasa larawan, saan mo siya posibleng matagpuan?
A: St. Luke’s Medical Center
B: Office of the Communications Group
C: PCSO Office
D: ABS-CBN Newsroom

7: Kumpletuhin ang tweet ni palace spokesperson Edwin Lacierda kamakailan: “_____________ is a liar then, he is a liar now.”
A: Garci
B: Genuino
C: FG
D: Bedol

8: Kababalik lamang ni Venezuelan President Hugo Chavez sa kaniyang bansa matapos itong sumailalim sa chemoteraphy. Where?
A: North Korea
B: Japan
C: Cuba
D: Brazil

9: Sa balitang napamahal ang bili niya sa kanyang bagong property sa Forbes Park, Makati City, ano ang reaksyon ni Cong. Manny Pacquiao?
A. “Ipapagpasa-Diyos ko na lang.”
B: “Kung nalamangan ako, eh di kasalanan ko na nagpalamang ako!”
C: “Intriga lang ‘yan. Hindi totoo ‘yan.”
D: “Pera lang naman ‘yan. Kikitain ko pa rin naman.”

10: Ayon sa 2011 Forbes Billionaires list, sino ang pinakamayamang Pilipino?
A: Lucio Tan
B: John Gokongwei Jr.
C: Jaime Zobel De Ayala
D: Henry Sy

11: Sino sa mga sumusunod ang may misis na former Bb. Pilipinas-Universe?
A: Atty. Koko Pimentel
B: Sen. Migz Zubiri
C: Sen. Antonio Trillanes IV
D: Atty. Edwin Lacierda

12: Kung gusto mong makausap ang lalaki sa larawan, sino ang dapat mong tawagan?
A: Amanda Coling
B: Nora Aunor
C: Charo Santos
D: Vice Ganda
————————————————————————-
“Yes, there are times when something is legitimately not our fault. Blaming others, however, keeps us in a stuck state and is ultimately rough on our own self-esteem.”
- Eric Allenbaugh

Enjoy your weekend!


Share this on Facebook and Twitter: Add to FaceBookAdd to Twitter
I am on Twitter: @HecklerForever.

To the UP Fighting Maroons, good luck on your game against UST on Sunday! UP Fight!





LAPSES

14 07 2011

DID YOU MONITOR the Senate Blue Ribbon Committee’s hearing on the PCSO fund mess Wednesday? The hearing was attended by several bishops plus, of course, their savior, the senators.


At least eight bishops and a dozen senators converged Wednesday in the Senate. It was a face-off between pretentious, holier-than-thou, self-proclaimed devout Catholics, and bishops.

PCSO chair Margie Juico apologized for saying that the bishops received “Pajeros.” Sen. Jinggoy Estrada lectured Juico, and said “As a devout Catholic, it pains me to hear that our bishops are involved in anomalies here in our country.” To which, the bishops replied, “The feeling is mutual.”

Butuan Bishop Juan De Dios Pueblos admitted that he made a “lapse in judgment” when he asked for “a brand new car.” And in a move that shocked both the bishops and senators, Virgilio Garcillano issued a statement saying he never gave Pueblos a car.

Reading from a prepared opening statement, controversial Butuan Bishop Juan De Dios Pueblos admitted that he made a “lapse in judgement” in asking for “a brand new car” from former president Gloria Macapagal-Arroyo. As soon as he was done reading, the other bishops held hands and started singing, “If We Hold on Together.”

Actress Susan Roces who was watching Bishop Pueblos on TV was like, “Ang sinungaling ay kapatid ng magnanakaw! You wrote that letter not once, but twice!”

Zaldy
Former governor Zaldy Ampatuan revealed that ex-president Gloria Macapagal-Arroyo was involved in the election fraud in Maguindanao in 2007. Likewise, he  revealed that Jose Rizal was killed by the Spanish; the Earth revolves around the sun, and John Lennon was shot by Mark David Chapman.

Apparently, Zaldy Ampatuan wants to turn state witness. Against Gloria Macapagal-Arroyo.

Zaldy Ampatuan has initiated court proceedings to change his last name. He is seeking a little compassion and empathy from the public. Hopefully, the judge would grant his petition to use the surname Mangudadatu.

Lintang Bedol
Former Maguindanao election supervisor Lintang Bedol has surfaced and accused the Arroyos of masterminding the election fraud in Maguindanao in 2007. Oh, I thought Lintang Bedol was dead. Well, now he is.

Lintang Bedol has exposed the alleged massive poll fraud in Maguindanao in 2007. Following his revelation, Bedol expressed fear for his life while Miguel Zubiri expressed fear for his post.

With his revelations against the Arroyos and other officials of the previous administration, Lintang Bedol has expressed fear for his life. He now considers changing his name.

De Lima’s Lovelife
Interviewed on ANC’s Strictly Politics, Justice Secretary Leila De Lima, whose marriage was annulled in 2001, admitted that she has a boyfriend. The 51-year-old single mom refuses to identify the guy nor his background but reveals she has six (new) witnesses to prove her claim.

Justice Secretary Leila De Lima has a lovelife. Take that Mr. President!

Absent!
Among congressmen with the most number of absences in sessions, Sarangani Rep. Manny Pacquiao placed fourth. In other words, he’s not present when solons deliberate on important issues. How are they able to tell?

Ang Galing Pinoy party-list Rep. Mikey Arroyo topped the list of absentees in the House of Representatives. In May 2011 alone, Mikey failed to attend a single session of the chamber. In totally unrelated news, Rufa Mae Quinto topped the list of absentees among “Showbiz Central” hosts for the month of May.
——————————————————————————————-
“Men of ill judgment ignore the good that lies within their hands, ‘til they have lost it.”
~Sophocles

Quote of the Week
“Manny’s a good friend, I actually love him. I love his tenacity, I love his competitiveness. So, Manny’s my guy.”
~NBA superstar Kobe Bryant on Manny Pacquiao

You Have Spoken
Dapat bang ipagbawal ang billboard ng mga naka-underwear na modelo/celebrities??
-Dapat lang. Offensive! 35.36%
-Hayaan na lang! Karapatan nila ‘yan. 26.15%
-Big deal? Ke meron o wala, wala akong pakialam sa mga ‘yan. 38.49%

Kobe! Kobe! Kobe!
It was an awesome experience – as always. Kobe’s fourth visit to Manila was the most attended. Araneta Coliseum was filled to the rafters. Laker and non-Laker fans trooped to the Big Dome Wednesday to see the Black Mamba.

Thank you again TJ Manotoc for the tickets. I was seated beside two Azkals, Jason Sabio and Simon Greatwich, whom I wrongly identified in my tweet as Rob Gier. Apologies.

Thank you Kobe for the visit. Lakers4ever.

Personal
I have a Twitter follower whose father, Mr. Lory Ordenes is a regular reader of this blog. Magandang araw po sa mga taga-Sablayan, Occidental Mindoro and thanks for reading sir!

Enjoy the rest of the week!

Share this on Facebook and Twitter: Add to FaceBookAdd to Twitter
I am on Twitter: @HecklerForever.





HYPOCRITES, INC.

9 07 2011

Intelligence Funds
During Thursday’s Senate hearing, it was revealed that in 2010 alone, the Philippine Charity Sweepstakes Office released 150 million pesos for intelligence – higher than the AFP’s annual intelligence fund of 124.3 million pesos. Former PCSO General Manager Rosario Uriarte defended the disbursement of the amount saying the PCSO was able to neutralize Communist rebels, Muslim extremists, and the Abu Sayyaf Group.

PCSO General Manager Rosario Uriarte revealed that the letters of request for intelligence funds totaling 325 million pesos from April 2008 to Feb. 25, 2010 were approved by then President Gloria Macapagal-Arroyo. Uriarte was certain those were GMA’s signatures because she was just one foot away from her when she signed the documents.

JV vs. Mikey
Amid the PCSO fund controversy, former president Joseph Estrada’s son, San Juan Rep. JV Ejercito traded barbs with former president Gloria Macapagal-Arroyo’s son, Pampanga Rep. Mikey Arroyo. Here’s their fiery Twitter exchange:

@TheRealJVEjercito
For the reason that they have taken advantage of the Filipino people, they should be sentenced with life imprisonment.

@MightyMikeyArroyo
Palibhasa neophyte ka sa Kongreso kaya wala kang paggalang sa kapwa mo kongresista. Publicity lang ang habol mo.

@TheRealJVEjercito
Correction! Hindi publicity ang habol ko. Ang habol ko, maipakulong kayo!

@MightyMikeyArroyo
Wow, ang linis. Sino bang na-sentensyahan ng life imprisonment dahil sa plunder? Eh ‘di ba ‘yong ama mo?

@TheRealJVEjercito
Hoy! For your information hindi pera ng gobyerno ang kinuha ng tatay ko!

@MightyMikeyArroyo
Ah oo nga naman, jueteng money ‘yon. Pera ng tao. Eh ‘di mas malala!

@TheRealJVEjercito
May mas lalala pa ba sa pandaraya sa eleksyon ng ina mo!

@MightyMikeyArroyo
Ina mo rin! Tapos na ang isyung ‘yan. ‘Wag mo nang ungkatin. Bitter ka lang dahil hindi nagtagal sa puwesto ang tatay mo! ‘Buti na lang at nabisto ang mga kickback niya sa jueteng!

@TheRealJVEjercito
Ah ganun!? Eh ‘yong kickback ng magulang mo sa NBN-ZTE deal? Kumusta naman?

@MightyMikeyArroyo
Hindi nasangkot ang nanay ko sa murder. Baka lang nalimutan mo, hindi pa sarado ang kaso nina Dacer at Corbito!

@TheRealJVEjercito
Fertilizer fund scam ng ina mo!

@MightyMikeyArroyo
Boracay mansion ng ama mo!

@TheRealJVEjercito
Mas kaduda-duda naman ang mga mansion n’yo sa California!

@MightyMikeyArroyo
At least ang nanay ko, walang kabit at hindi marami ang asawa?

@TheRealJVEjercito
Rufa Mae Quinto!

@MightyMikeyArroyo
‘Wag kang mamersonal! Break na kami. Last year pa!

@TheRealJVEjercito
Hahaha! Wala ka nang maisumbat! Naubusan ka na talaga! Loser!

@MightyMikeyArroyo
Anong wala? Kapatid mo si Jinggoy!

@TheRealJVEjercito
Eeew. Matagal ko nang tinanggap ‘yon!

@MightyMikeyArroyo
Eh bakit s’ya hindi pa?!

@TheRealJVEjercito
Hindi ko na ‘yon problema. Tapos ka na? Ako marami pa! Hello na lang kay Mrs. Lilia Pineda! Tumbok na otsenta, sahod na kuwarenta! Hahaha

@MightyMikeyArroyo
Kung magsalita ‘to, para naman ‘yong ama niya eh hindi kumita sa mga Pineda!

@TheRealJVEjercito
Old issue!

@MightyMikeyArroyo
Walang utang na loob! Kung ‘di dahil sa ina ko, nakakulong pa rin ang ama mo.

@TheRealJVEjercito
Walang kasalanan ang tatay ko.

@MightyMikeyArroyo
Babaero at lasenggo!

@TheRealJVEjercito
Rehashed.

@MightyMikeyArroyo
Sugarol!

@TheRealJVEjercito
Recycled.

@MightyMikeyArroyo
Bakla!

@TheRealJVEjercito
Tanga! Baka ‘yong kapatid ko.

@MightyMikeyArroyo
Haha! Addict ka talaga!

@TheRealJVEjercito
Ay siya rin ‘yon! Joooke! You didn’t hear it from me huh!

@MightyMikeyArroyo
Sure! So pa’no? Ceasefire muna?

@TheRealJVEjercito
Oks lang. Dahil tomorrow naman ay Linggo, payag ako. Unsolicited advice lang: magsimba kayo!

@MightyMikeyArroyo
Bakit naman pati ‘yon pinapakialaman mo?

@TheRealJVEjercito
Wala naman. Concerned lang. Sa dami ng ibinabatong kaso sa ina mo, hindi lang doble kundi tripleng dasal ang kailangan n’yo.

@MightyMikeyArroyo
Wait, sino nga ulit ang bakla sa mga kapatid mo?

@TheRealJVEjercito
Ha-ha-ha Peace! Logout na ‘ko!
-END OF TWITTER EXCHANGE-

SUV-shops
The good news is seven bishops will return the PCSO money used to purchase their sport utility vehicles. The bad news is starting tomorrow (Sunday), there will be a second collection at the end of Mass.

Butuan Bishop Juan de Dios Pueblos says he is a victim of “character assassination.” Excuse me Bishop, but last time we checked, it was you who asked for “a brand new car, possibly a 4 x 4” for your birthday gift! There was hardly anything left of your character to “assassinate!”

Top 10 Things Overheard at the CBCP’s Bi-Annual Plenary Meeting Held Saturday, July 9, 2011

No. 10: “Ang tigas kasi ng ulo mo! Sinabihan na kita noon pa, lumayo ka na kay GMA. Hindi ka nakinig. O, anong napala mo?”

No. 9: “Sa ayaw at sa gusto n’yo, ibabalik natin! Ito lang ang paraan upang malinis ang pangalan ng Simbahan.”

No. 8: “Bishop, sino sa palagay n’yo ang ama ng ipinagbubuntis ni Andi Eigenmann? Albie Casiño o Jake Ejercito? | Ay! Mas pasok sa plangganang butas ‘yong Jake! In fairness! Forgive me Lord!”

No. 7: “Sino ba ang Elizabeth Angsioco na ‘yan at bakit ‘di n’yo mapatahimik?

No. 6: “Hello? Hello? Medyo chubby po kayo Madam President. Ang labo po ng linya n’yo. Hello? Nasa plenary meeting lang po ako. Let me return your call in a while. Yes Madam President. Yes. Huwag ho kayong mag-alala. Hindi ko kayo ilalaglag.”

No. 5: “‘Yong pito sa inyo na laman ng balita ngayon, umisip na kayo ng ibibigay na eksplanasyon sa Vaticano. Mga hinayupak kayo!”

No. 4: “Ito ay pagsubok lamang sa katatagan ng ating paninindigan laban sa RH Bill. Huwag kayong bibigay sa pressure ng mga kampon ng demonyo.”

No. 3: “Pareng Bishop, atin-atin lang ‘to huh! Nakita mo ba ‘yong binaklas na billboard ng Philippine Volcanoes sa Edsa? Grabe! Hindi ko kinaya. Luveeet!”

No. 2: “After ng plenary, kausapin n’yo na ang mga in-assign sa inyong abogado. Paturo na kayo ng isasagot para hindi kayo tatanga-tanga ‘pag tinanong kayo sa hearing next week.”

And the No. 1 thing overheard at the CBCP’s bi-annual plenary meeting held Saturday, July 9…

“Hindi naman ako ang unang nag-draft ng letter na ‘yon kay GMA eh. Hiniram ko lang ‘yong template ni Bishop ******. Bakit ‘yong sulat ko ang napag-initan ni Margie Juico at ng PCSO?”

Overseas
Last Tuesday, a Florida jury found Casey Anthony not guilty of killing her 2-year-old daughter Caylee in 2008. Anthony wasn’t happy though because just this morning, the DOJ and the NBI announced they had found at least six new witnesses against her.
————————————————————————
“We have two kinds of morality side by side: one which we preach but do not practice and another which we practice but seldom preach.”
~Bertrand Russell

You Have Spoken
Ayon sa ilang obispo, pinag-iinitan daw sila ng gobyerno. Makatwiran ba ang kanilang reklamo?
-Oo nga naman. Unfair ang trato sa kanila. 7.1%
-Hindi ‘no! Dapat lang silang imbestigahan! 85.8%
-Magbabasa muna ako. Huli na ‘ko sa balita. 7.1%

Share this on Facebook and Twitter:Add to FaceBookAdd to Twitter
I am on Twitter: @HecklerForever.





“KADIRI”

29 06 2011

The Vizconde Massacre Case
The NBI announced they found at least six new witnesses in the Vizconde massacre case. If the NBI was this eager in locating Panfilo Lacson last year, they would have found him six times.

According to the new witnesses, Hubert Webb was in the country when the Vizconde massacre took place. And in another breakthrough, the NBI claims the new witnesses are willing to testify that Hubert Webb was also in the country when Ninoy Aquino was assassinated.

Justice Secretary Leila De Lima says the new witnesses have no reason or motive to fabricate their respective statements. For security reasons, she identified them as alias Pitong, alias George, alias Rey, alias Mario, alias Jerry and alias Jack… collectively known as alias NBI.

The NBI’s new batch of witnesses includes an electrician, a haircutter, a security guard, a shabu dealer, and two guys who played basketball with Hubert. Welcome to the new season of Survivor!

The National Bureau of Investigation said an alias Black Maria, and not state witness Jessica Alfaro might have been present when the Vizconde massacre took place. I wouldn’t be surprised if the NBI declares the massacre a hoax.

Word of the Day
Dry humor – noun: See “President Aquino”
Example: “… pagbaba ko po sa puwesto sa 2016, sana po’y nakapag-asawa na, babangon naman kayo sa isang Pilipinas na mas maunlad.

Humor
Presidential spokesperson Edwin Lacierda admits, “the President’s humor is dry.” Among other things.

Rumor
Reports say President Aquino was smitten with Filipino-Korean TV/radio host Grace Lee. The President believes Lee is his Seoul mate.

Bi-Noy
Vice President Jejomar Binay was quoted to have said that he didn’t want to compare himself with President Aquino saying, “we’re not comparing apple to apple.” Sige, let’s say apple to duhat. Puwede na ba ‘yon?

“Kadiri”
Novaliches Bishop Emeritus Teodoro Bacani says same sex union is “kadiri.” Bacani believes marriage is sacred and should only be between a man and a woman. If she refuses, harass her!

Korina and Mar
Interviewed by entertainment editor Ricky Lo, broadcast journalist Korina Sanchez has denied persistent rumors that her marriage with incoming DOTC Secretary Mar Roxas is on the rocks. Let’s be fair people. Let’s get the side of Mar.

Davao Flooding
As of 3pm, Wednesday, 15 people have been reported dead while 10 others are still missing after flashfloods hit Davao City. Residents are blaming the heavy rains and the flooding for those deaths; which is rather uncommon. Usually, they blame the Davao Death Squad.

Sky Flakes
I love Sky Flakes. I can also act. Hey Rafael Santos, can I star in your next film?

Asked why he hired theater actors for his movies, short film director Rafael Santos said, “You can feed them Sky Flakes three meals a day, and I pay them in cat food basically.” Santos directed the 2011 Cinemalaya entry, ‘Samarito.’ He’s now working on his next project called ‘Ingrato.’

Short film director Rafael Santos says he prefers theater actors over mainstream artists because, “You can feed them Sky Flakes three meals a day, and I pay them in cat food basically.” If only for his brand of humor, I’d say Santos has a huge chance of becoming president someday.

Engaged
Vicki Belo and Hayden Kho are reportedly engaged. In fact, Kho just gave Vicki a ring. Take that LeBron James!

Reports say Hayden Kho proposed to Vicki Belo last year. There was this awkwardly tense moment though when Hayden popped the question. Vicki Belo got so excited, her cheeks moved.

And how did Hayden Kho propose? He waxed poetic!
—————————————————
“Injustice anywhere is a threat to justice everywhere.”
~Martin Luther King Jr.

Quotes of the Weak
“Kaya pag inimbita ho ako sa Cebu, hindi ho talaga mahirap maimbita rito. Pati ang bisita nating si Miss Grace Lee, akala ko tuloy Pinay e. Hindi nga pala, Korean. Pero pati yung mga Korean na dumarating talagang gwapa lahat. Kailangan yatang buhayin ang Malacanang [sa] Sugbu. Baka dito na rin tayo magkatuluyan.”
~President Aquino during the KEPCO-SPC coal power plant inauguration in Cebu hosted by Grace Lee

“Sorry na lang, napapangitan ako talaga. Para sa akin kadiri! Lalaki sa lalaki, babae sa babae, mag-aasawa.”
~ Bishop Teodoro Bacani

“Excuse me, sweet kami ha. And the weirdest rumors pa, fight daw kami nang fight, nag-alsa balutan daw ako, may third party daw. None of the above. Wishful thinking lang ‘yan ng mga inggitera at kalaban ni Mar sa pulitika.”
~Broadcaster Korina Sanchez

“Personally, I find that theater actors are better to work with because they don’t complain. You can feed them Sky Flakes three meals a day, and I pay them in cat food basically. And they’re never late, and they cry when you want them to cry. Other actors kasi you have to hit them first.”
~ Short film director Rafael Santos on why he hires theater actors

[Theater actor Joel Trinidad reacts.]

Briefly Noted
Reporters, news anchors, government officials, and even lawyers must be told: “(Double) JEOPARDY” is not pronounced as ‘jaw-par-dee.’ It’s ‘je-pәr-dē’ or ‘je-pә(r)-dē’ (Merriam-Webster).

You Have Spoken
Ayon sa dating pangulong Gloria Macapagal-Arroyo, ‘leaderless’ daw ang gobyerno. Your take:
-Agree! 49.57%
-Shut up! 44.87%
-Wala akong pakialam. 5.56%

Share this on Facebook or Twitter: Add to FaceBookAdd to Twitter
FYI, I am on Twitter. Join our trivia game by following me @HecklerForever.

Stay healthy! Live. Learn. Love. Laugh.





OF DATES AND DEBATES

20 05 2011


Pacman Interpellates
World boxing champion and anti-RH Bill solon Manny Pacquiao slugged it out with veteran lawmaker Edcel Lagman in Congress last Wednesday night. It was a mismatch. The welterweight was exposed as a lightweight.

Albay Rep. Edcel Lagman thus snapped Manny Pacquiao’s 14-bout winning streak.

Did you see the Pacquiao-Lagman bout last Wednesday? Even if Pacman used steroids, he would have still lost that one.

Before he interpellated Albay Rep. Edcel Lagman, Sarangani Rep. Manny Pacquiao told the media he spent the whole night reading and studying the RH Bill. It didn’t show.

After 12 rounds of Q&A, Lagman scored well in research; Pacquiao, scored fairly in reading.

Although the main event was lackluster, the undercard was thrilling and entertaining. Mommy Dionisia Pacquiao posted her first career win when Sen. Miriam Defensor-Santiago decided to throw in the towel.

Defending her son against Senator Santiago’s advice that he should “stay out of the RH Bill debate,” a fuming Mommy Dionisia said, “Ang pakialaman nila ‘yong malaswa. Gusto ko ang pakialaman nila ‘yong malaswaaaaaaa!” To which Willie Revillame said, “O? Ano na namang ginawa ko?”

Quoting God, Cong. Manny Pacquiao said everyone must “go out to the world and multiply.” His statement was seconded by the CBCP, anti-RH Bill groups, and Arnold Schwarzenegger.


Sperminator
Arnold Schwarzenegger admitted that he fathered a child with a member of his household staff. The kid is now a fourth grader at the International Cyborg Institute.

Former California governor Arnold Schwarzenegger fathered a child outside of his marriage. The other son was identified as Jose Victor or JV.

Arnold Schwarzenegger kept the child secret for 10 years. Maria Shriver discovered it with the help of US Navy SEALs.


Bilibid Or Not
Bureau of Corrections director Ernesto Diokno is in hot water these days. This, after ABS-CBN cameras caught convicted killer and former Batangas governor Antonio Leviste outside the New Bilibid Prisons, specifically, in Makati and Binondo – at least four times. Rumors say Diokno is on his way out. In fact, his post has been offered to Anthony Taberna.

According to records, former Batangas governor Antonio Leviste is a ‘living out’ inmate – meaning, he is free to move around the New Bilibid Prisons (NBP). The records didn’t explain though how Binondo and Makati City became part of the NBP.


Noy’s New Date
President Aquino invited a certain Bunny Calica to a date last Monday. Reports say Bunny is 27 years old, very simple, intelligent, and the type of person who wouldn’t say no to the elderly.

The Philippine Daily Inquirer reported that Bunny Calica had dinner with Baby James and Joshua Aquino at the Bahay Pangarap in Malacañang recently. The information came from the fourth member of President Aquino’s Communications Group, Kris Aquino.

According to Kris, while having dinner, Baby James or Bimby asked Bunny, “Are you my tito’s girlfriend?” It was the President who answered, “No. But I hope so.” And then there was an awkward moment when Bimby said, “Hope? My daddy too.”

Top 5 Things Bunny Calica Shouldn’t Say if Baby James Asked, “Are you my tito’s girlfriend?”

No. 5: “Anak ka nga ng ina mo!”

No. 4: “You wish!”

No. 3: “Puwede na rin. End of the world na naman bukas eh.”

No. 2: “Actually, I’m your tito’s boyfriend. Mahaba lang ang buhok ko.”

And the No. 1 thing Bunny Calica shouldn’t say if Baby James asked, “Are you my tito’s girlfriend?”

“No Tito Boy. We’re just friends.”
—————————————————————
“Don’t worry about the world coming to an end today. It’s already tomorrow in Australia.”
~Charles Schultz

Quote of the Weak
“As you know I am still single. If I ever get a chance to go out on a date, it seems that I have invited the entire Filipino people to join me on that date. And I wonder who gave them the right.”
~ President Noynoy Aquino

- Eh ‘di magsumbong ka sa lolo mong panot!
You don’t want attention? STAY HOME! Problema ba ‘yon?

Have a great weekend!

Share this on Facebook and Twitter: Add to FaceBookAdd to Twitter
I am on Twitter: @HecklerForever








Follow

Get every new post delivered to your Inbox.

Join 72,354 other followers

%d bloggers like this: