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5 01 2013

2013 Film Festival: The Official Entries

ILL PRESIDENTE
Synopsis: Isang post apocalyptic thriller tungkol sa isang dating lider na na-addict sa Botox. Nagkalat ang poster, tarps, at streamer ng dating lider sa kanilang lalawigan. Sa pagnanais na maging kaaya-aya ang kanyang hitsura sa kanyang nasasakupan, naging sugapa sa Botox ang dating lider. Ngunit lahat ng sobra ay masama. Hindi nakontrol ng dating lider ang kanyang addiction at nauwi ito sa kagimbal-gimbal na pangyayaring babago sa kanyang buhay. Ito na ba ang kanyang katapusan? Why not?

SISTERAKET
Synopsis: Nakaligtas ang magkakapatid na Felimon, Magda at Josefina sa kahindik-hindik na paglilinis ng Comelec sa listahan ng mga party-list groups. Sa desisyong ‘di inasahan ng magkakapatid, na-accredit sila for the 2013 midterm elections. Marami ang nadismaya sa pangyayaring ito lalo pa’t alam ng publiko na mulitimillionaire ang kanilang pamilya. Ang ama nila ay mataas ang katungkulan sa hudikatura at incumbent congressman ang dalawa nilang pinsang-buo. Hindi rin malinaw kung anong marginalized group ang kanilang kinakatawan. Magtagumpay kaya ang magkakapatid sa kanilang raket ngayong Mayo? Bakit sila pinayagang tumakbo ng Comelec? Kailan magigising ang mga botante sa lantarang panlolokong ito?

THE STRANGER
Synopsis: Palaaway ang imahe ni Felicidad Escovedo sa entertainment industry. Kada linggo ay marami itong tinatalakan sa iba’t ibang platform. Multimedia war freak ang bansag sa kanya. Dahil napagod at nabagot na yata sa kakaaway, nagpasya itong pasukin ang pulitika. Walang karanasan sa paggawa ng batas si Felicidad. Sabi nga niya sa isang panayam, “It feels strange.” Ngunit kumpiyansa itong magtatagumpay dahil sa suporta ng mga kaalyadong artista. Kung ikaw ay kababayan ni Felicidad, iboboto mo ba siya ngayong Mayo? Kung oo, anong problema mo?

ANG AGIMAT NI TATANG AT SI AKO
Synopsis: See last year’s + si AKO.

YOSI PROBLEMS
Synopsis: High school pa lang ay mahilig na sa babae ang anak-mayaman at ngayon ay mambabatas na si Juan Alfredo Miguel Antonio Niccolo Teodoro Enrique Montelibano o Jamante for short. Ngunit walang hilig sa kanya ang babae. Hindi tumatagal ang kanyang mga relasyon. Dahil sa sunud-sunod na kabiguan, nalulong si Jamante sa sigarilyo. Ang nikotina ang kanyang naging ‘buhay.’ Sa katunayan, kinakapos ito ng hininga at tila nanghihina kapag walang hinihitit na yosi. Isang araw, may nakilala siyang maganda at mas batang babae. Na-love at first sight siya. Grabe ang tama men! Ngunit may kondisyon ang babae bago nito ibigay ang matamis na oo kay Jamante: “tumigil ka sa paninigarilyo!” Now that’s a yosi problem! Alin ang pipiliin ni Jamante: bisyo o babae?

SHAKE, RATTLE, AND ROFL 14: THE BEAUTY QUEEN
Synopsis: Tinangkang bawian ng korona ang 2010-2013 Bb. Cebu-Galaxy na si Maria Perfidia Dimayacyac. Pinagbintangan itong nam-bully ng kanyang runner-up sa patimpalak. Ngunit nanindigan si Dimayacyac na ‘di niya ibibigay ang korona dahil malinis niya itong napanalunan. Sa kabila ng pakiusap ng organizers na umalis na ito sa stage dahil gagamitin ng iba ang venue, nagmatigas ang beauty queen. Ayaw talaga nitong bumaba. Lumakas pa ang kanyang loob matapos umani ng suporta mula sa Ginoong Makati-Galaxy; sa former Ginoong San Juan-World, at sa reigning Ginoong Cagayan-International. Inabutan na si Dimayacyac ng Pasko at Bagong Taon sa entablado at plano pa yatang doon mag-Valentine’s Day. Gayunman, nagbanta ang mga organizers ng pageant na puwersahan nilang palalayasin ang dalaga kung hindi ito boluntaryong aalis. Mauwi kaya sa karahasan ang timpalak pagandahan? Sino ang unang kukurap? Get shaken, get rattled and get rollin’ sa ika-labing-apat na edisyon ng paborito n’yong komedya: Shake, Rattle and ROFL.

JUAN MORE TRY
Synopsis: Matapos magpalit ng relihiyon, dalawang sunod na pagkatalo ang nalasap ng boksingerong si Juan Emmanuel De La Hoya. Nais ng kanyang pamilya na tuluyan na itong magretiro dahil malaki na rin naman ang kanyang naipon. Ngunit alinlangan si Juan Emmanuel na sundin ang hiling ng kanyang pamilya. Sayang raw ang kikitain sa susunod na dalawa o tatlong fight. Sa halip na mag-quit, nagpasya itong magpalit na lamang ulit ng relihiyon upang subukan kung ano ang pinaka-effective. Ano kayang sekta ang kanyang pipiliin this time? Magresulta kaya sa tagumpay ang hakbang na ito? Bakit galit na galit si Chino Trinidad sa report na may early signs na raw ng Parkinson’s Disease si Manny Pacquiao? Wala pa bang reaksyon si Dyan Castillejo? Bakit kung saan-saan na napunta ang synopsis na ito?

DIE WOMB
Synopsis: Promising star. Nabuntis. Ayaw mawalan ng career. Nagpa-abort. Ang twist: bumangon mula sa hukay ang ipinalaglag na fetus at gustong bumalik sa sinapupunan ng kanyang walang pusong ina. Ang tanong: makabalik kaya siya?

Advisory: The 2013 Film Festival officially begins today. Free admission.
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“A wide screen just makes a bad film twice as bad.”
~Samuel Goldwyn

Sound Bites
“Simple reply, how sad for him because I’m here to stay [and] will try my best to bug him for many years more!”
~Kris Aquino reacting to a negative review of MMFF topgrosser ‘Sisterakas’

Have a great weekend!

I am on Twitter: @HecklerForever.





POST CHRISTMAS

26 12 2012

CHRISTMAS is over. That was quick! It seems like only yesterday when I started a Christmas countdown on Twitter. To have an idea of how fast time flies, you just have to stare at Cebu Governor Gwendolyn Garcia! Mukhang Biyernes Santo!

TIME Lists
Defiant, suspended Cebu Governor Gwen Garcia spent Christmas inside her office at the Cebu Capitol. On Sunday, she was visited by Juan Ponce Enrile, Jejomar Binay, and Joseph Estrada. Garcia felt a bit awkward though when she learned that the three politicians brought gold, frankincense, and myrrh.

Senatorial aspirants Nancy Binay and Ernesto Maceda also came to show their support for the embattled governor. In totally unrelated news, Cebu is a vote-rich province.

Injuries
The Department of Health says the number of firecracker-related injuries as of December 24, 2012 has already surpassed last year’s figures. Apparently, Dr. Eric Tayag’s Gangnam Style didn’t work.

The Health Department is reportedly recommending a partial or total firecracker ban next year. How about a TOTAL idiot ban? [Ang titigas ng ulo. Buwisit!]

Under Philippine laws, there are at least 19 illegal firecrackers in the country. Unfortunately, there are at least 50 ways to circumvent the law.

Peaceful
The Philippine National Police says Christmas Eve in the Philippines was “generally peaceful” – except perhaps in our house where a cousin belted out 4Non-Blondes’ “What’s Up!”

The Pope on Xmas
In his annual Christmas Eve mass in St. Peter’s Basilica, Pope Benedict XVI called on technology-driven Roman Catholics to find time for God and others instead of technology. In other news, Pope Benedict XVI has eight Twitter accounts. I only have two. Well…

RH Bill and Xmas
The story of Christmas is a fascinating one. According to the story, an angel told Mary she’s going to be pregnant. She did. She gave birth to just ONE. That was the origin of family planning.

SWS Survey
A Social Weather Stations surveyed showed that this Christmas (2012), Filipinos were less materialistic. Ahm, plastic?

The Most
According to Google Philippines, “Jesse Robredo” was the top “trending search” for 2012 among politicians – while the most ‘searched’ politician during House sessions was Jules Ledesma.

The Best
Nonito “The Filipino Flash” Donaire has been selected by ESPN.com as “Fighter of the Year.” In close second was Baron Geisler.

MMFF 2012
The annual Metro Manila Film Festival officially opened December 25. Now it can be told! The Mayans were just slightly off the mark.

I just read the complete list of competing movies in the 2012 MMFF. There’s fantasy, comedy, and drama. The most surprising for me was the inclusion of the biopic of former PBA star Ramon Fernandez.

There are eight entries in the 2012 film fest. There’s comedy, action, fantasy, and drama. Based on initial reviews, most of them are ‘horror.’ Scary.
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“There’s nothing sadder in this world than to awake Christmas morning and not be a child.”
~Erma Bombeck

In case you missed:
- Page 2012: A Year-Ender
- WTF: The Epal Quiz Year-Ender

Happy New Year!

I am on Twitter: @HecklerForever.








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