OF WATER LILIES & CROCODILES

23 06 2011

THE CITY OF COTABATO is still submerged in floodwaters. Apparently, clearing Rio Grande De Mindanao of up to 20 hectares of water lily growth wasn’t enough to control the flooding. People are now wondering: how can we rid the Spratlys of the Chinese when we couldn’t even rid our rivers of water lilies?

President Aquino visited Cotabato City Wednesday. He personally witnessed the threats posed by hectares and hectares of water hyacinth growth in Rio Grande De Mindanao. If the threat persists, the President will reportedly deploy  BRP Rajah Humabon to the mighty river.

LTO chief Virginia Torres has an unsolicited advice to solve the problem in Cotabato City: “take over the Rio Grande De Mindanao!”

But Albay Governor Joey Salceda has a more radical suggestion: “boycott all products from the river!”

Maguindanao Trial
The good news is NBN Channel 4 will air the live and non-stop coverage of the Maguindanao massacre trial. Even better news is… meron pa palang Channel 4!

Approval Rating
According to a study conducted by Pulse Asia, 7 out of 10 Filipinos approve of President Aquino’s performance. The other three were identified as Len, Liz, and Shalani.

Odd!
In Tanauan City, a poultry worker discovered  a newly-hatched chick with four feet. In another odd story, residents of Batasan Hills in Quezon City reported frequent sightings of crocodiles with two feet.

Meanwhile, the hunt is on for a crocodile that reportedly attacked and killed a 36-year-old man in Bataraza, Palawan Tuesday. Authorities are trying to determine the crocodile’s size, age, and district.

Speaking of crocodiles, former Pagcor chief… (sa ibang araw na nga lang.)

Philippines’ Wealthiest
In the annual Forbes list of richest Filipinos, GMA 7 executive Gilberto Duavit ranked 26th while Atty. Felipe Gozon was at No. 30. ABS-CBN’s Gabby Lopez was ranked 39th but he is confident of overtaking his GMA rivals in a separate survey to be conducted by Kantar (TNS) Media.

No to Necrophilia
Senators Manny Villar and Jinggoy Estrada have filed separate bills seeking to criminalize necrophilia – specifically, having sex with a corpse. The proposed measure has reportedly scared off prospective suitors of Madam Auring!
—————————————————————————–
“Water, water, every where,
Nor any drop to drink.”
~Samuel Taylor Coleridge, ‘The Rime of the Ancient Mariner’

Quotes of the Weak
“Sa ngayon pag-iisipan natin, gusto ko lang makita personally, doon sa mga parating binabaha. Paalala ko lang, ise-celebrate pa lang namin ng first year ng aming administration.”
~President Aquino in a speech during his visit to Cotabato City Wednesday

“Dapat, whether 1 year or 6 months ka palang, iyung ganitong problema may immediate solution na.”
~Cotabato City Mayor Japal Guiani reacting to the president’s statement

Photo of the Weak
Ano ang sinasabi ng lalaki sa larawan?
A: “Kung ‘di siguro ako naging pangulo, baka nagta-target shooting ako sa oras na ito.”
B: “Napakalamig naman sa siyudad na ito. Kasing-lamig ng pakikitungo ng mayor nila sa akin.”
C: “Parang gusto kong kumanta. Hmm, teka… 1, 2, 3! Nakaligo ka na ba sa dagat ng water lily? Nag-Pasko ka na ba sa gitna ng Rio Grande?”
D: “’Pag ‘di pa naman tumaas ang rating ko sa susunod na survey, ewan ko na lang.”

Elsewhere
Forbes Magazine: Henry Sy, 86 is richest Filipino

YouTube: Manny Pacquiao HP TouchPad with WebOS Commercial

Personal
From award-winning playwright, Layeta Bucoy:
Dramatic reading of ‘Hermano Puli’
July 9 (Sat) 6pm, CCP Conference Room
For inquiries, please call the CCP Dramatic Arts Division at 832-1125 locals 1606 to 1607, or visit the website at http://www.culturalcenter.gov.ph.

Have a safe weekend ahead!

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I am on Twitter: @HecklerForever.





LIGHT BITES SATURDAY

23 10 2010

INTERCEPTED TWEETS from very private accounts of political and entertainment figures in the Philippines (October 18-23, 2010)

noynoy_4real
can’t wait for tuesday’s state visit to vietnam. hopes to find a hotdog vendor on the sidewalk of hanoi
5 minutes ago via Slate iPad

jojo_ocho_ahhh
@vina @concertqueen sorry ladies, can’t go out with you no more. mainit ang media. next time na lang. palamigin muna natin.
about 2 hours ago from web

mrpalengke
RT @noynoy_4real hopes to find a hotdog vendor on the sidewalk of Hanoi — PSST! sama ulit ako. gusto ko rin ng hotdogs!
35 seconds ago via Tweet Deck

THEother_ricopuno
thank god for the long weekend. will go target shooting. i’m no longer in the news. god is really good.
45 seconds ago via Tumblr

manolingmorato
@jojo_ocho_ahhh i love your twitter handle. ocho ba talaga? :-)
about 4 hours ago via UberTwitter

direkcarlo_J
punyeta! paano ako magkakautang eh ‘di pa nga kumpleto ang bayad ng pcso sa ginawa kong series na “pangarap kong jackpot?”
2 minutes ago from web

DrPrisconilo
nakaka-miss din pala ang radio at TV interviews
43 minutes ago from Tumblr

liz_uy
nope. not going to vietnam with him. the baseless rumors are killing me. kung alam n’yo lang ang totoo. eew.
45 minutes ago from API

PAGASA
@DrPrisconilo hahahahaha!
45 minutes ago from web

noynoy_4real
@liz_uy OUCH! bahala ka.
1 hour ago via Slate iPad

jules_L
yeah men! ‘musta ka na men! masdan mo ang aking mata, ‘di mo ba nakikita, ako ngayo’y lumilipad at nasa langit na! gusto mo bang… sumama? men.
about 10 minutes ago from HootSuite

THEother_ricopuno
“A true friend is someone who thinks that you are a good egg even though he knows that you are slightly cracked.” ~ Bernard Meltzer
30 minutes ago from Tweet Deck

supreme_court
we, in the high tribunal, believe that a true friend is someone who thinks that you are a good egg even though he knows that you are slightly cracked.
10 minutes ago via Tweet Deck

UP_Law
@supreme_court pati ba naman simpleng quotation sa twitter, plagiarized pa?
5 minutes ago

direkcarlo_J
@donna villa GOD HAVE MERCY ON US!
less than 35 seconds ago from web

supreme_court
@UP_Law nalimutan lang ‘yong attribution. OA kayo. we will cite you in contempt!
20 seconds ago

ricky_carandang
excited to check out this new resto at boni high street with @cesdrilon. sana walang media.
3 minutes ago via Slate iPad

ping!
still weighing my options. hindi ko talaga keri ang maposasan sa harap ng media.
about 2 hours ago from web

shalanisoledad
pasensya na po. next time na lang po.
2 seconds ago

green_go
@ping what options mista? u only have one at the moment: surrender! take note: DOJ sec is a woman. masamang magalit.
about 90 minutes ago from Echofon

iamkrisaquino
just finished shooting a kissing scene w/ diet. gosh, na-miss ko ‘to. it’s been, what? 10 months? hayyy.
42 minutes ago from UberTwitter

mayorLIM
pulis lang! pulis lang! ang magpapakamatay! (sinuntok ang keyboard) remember that! pulis lang!
about 1 hour ago from twitterfeed

iskomoreno
SA QUIAPO, MAY MURA MAYOR. RT @mayorLIM isko, may alam ka bang bilihan ng murang keyboard?
37 minutes ago via web

gma_in_congress
aba! bait-baitan yata si dinky kapag kaharap ako sha budget hearing. natakot shiguro. Hahaha 1 down, deles to go. weather-weather lang ‘yan.
2 days ago from web

RatedK
suuuuuper excited. hindi ko na mahintay ang january. handa na ba kayo… sa muling pamamayagpag ko?
about 5 hours ago via twitterfeed

JustJamby
oh no! i just lost tita chito’s forbes park house to my two cousins! dapat kasi nag-file ako ng appeal.
about 1 hour ago from Tweet Deck

mrpalengke
@RatedK i’m happy for you hon. araw-araw na ba uli kitang mapapanood?
2 hours ago via twitterfeed

willing_willie
this is it. salamat kay lord. tuloy na tuloy na po tayo mga kapatid. 5o’clock after e-live and startalk pero sa TV5. salamat kay MVP! @annafeliciano_choreographer ‘yong bikini ba ng mga dancers kumpleto na?
1 day ago

charo_mmk
@coryvidanes @RealGabby_Lopez huwaaat? walang TRO? pa’no na ‘yan?
20 hours ago

RealGabby_Lopez
@charo_mmk pa-draft ka ng statement kay bong osorio at lumabas ka sa ‘tv patrol’ mamaya. alam mo na ang treatment. dapat mukhang kawawa at mukhang aggrieved party tayo. will be monitoring.
21 hours ago

senator_litolapid
@senator_litolapid new hir. testing lang muna kung darating ang tweet ko. reply ka kaagad ha.
3 minutes ago via Tweet Deck

senator_litolapid
oo nga. mabilis nga ang message. salamat sa reply! RT @senator_litolapid new hir. testing lang muna kung darating ang tweet ko. reply ka kaagad ha.
1 minute ago via Tweet Deck

hayden_scent
may parating na typhoon katring. hmmm, i-video ko kaya?
20 hours ago

dyan_castillejo
@pacman FYI. i instructed my cameraman to record your sparring sessions. name is joseph. sunod na lang ako. paki-accommodate naman. thx. XOXO!
20 minutes ago via dlvr.it

pacman
@dyan_castillejo suri. no more cameras allow sa wild card gym. ‘tsaka pansin ni bob arum, subra na raw ang coverage mo, abala na sa training ko. ano nga pala ibig sabihin ng XOXO? soso?
13 minutes ago via ÜberTwitter
——————–
“Wala. Bakit? Ibibili mo ako?”
~TV host/actor German Moreno’s reply when actress Maxene Magalona asked, “Kuya Germs, meron kang Twitter?”

Survey Says
Sa iginawad na amnesty ni Pangulong Aquino sa mga coup plotters (Trillanes et al.):
– Dapat lang. Palayain sila! 36.81%
– Tutol ako d’yan. Parusahan ayon sa batas. 60.12%
– ‘Di ko alam ang issue. 3.07%

We have a new survey. Please vote now.

Enjoy your long weekend!

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