TOY STORY

14 01 2011

IT’S FRIDAY! Another work week is almost over! And what a week for Filipinos! Gas prices have gone up. The proposed MRT and LRT fare hike has been approved. And the President has a new sports car!

New Toy
Something new is making President Aquino smile these days. For a change, it’s not a new date.


Reports say President Aquino ditched his BMW for a Porsche. And then, he felt weird. You know… he’s used to being ditched, not the other way around.

The President’s got a new toy, a 2007 model Porsche. When the new toy was delivered last December, did you know what he did first? He returned Joshua’s PSP.

Last year, President Aquino was praised for frugality when he ate hotdogs on a New York street instead of spending thousands of dollars in a restaurant. Today, he is being criticized for buying a 4.5-million peso Porsche amid reports that the number of hungry Filipinos has gone up. To appease his critics, President Aquino plans to eat hotdogs in his Porsche.

Lawmakers have different reactions when they learned that President Aquino bought a Porsche. His allies wouldn’t fault him for it. Militant lawmakers couldn’t stomach it. Senator Lito Lapid couldn’t spell it. Toingk!

The Philippine Daily Inquirer reported that President Aquino tried to give his new car a test drive at the Clark Freeport last December 26. He didn’t enjoy it though because every time he would start the engine, Mar Roxas would appear and say, “Besprend itabi mo. Ako na!”

Comelec Chairmanship
The battle for the chairmanship of the Commission on Elections is on. Two names are neck-and-neck in the race: Balay and Noybi.

Election lawyers Romulo Macalintal and Sixto Brillantes are being considered by President Aquino to replace outgoing Comelec chairman Jose Melo. Reports say Macalintal has the backing of the LP/Balay faction while Brillantes has the support of the NoyBi/Samar faction. But palace spokesman Atty. Edwin Lacierda said, “No factions here. No one is pushing for anyone.” As usual, maang-maangan school of acting.

President Aquino screened the leading candidates for the chairmanship of the Commission on Elections last Monday. Palace insiders say the President asked the candidates one important question: “How vast is your knowledge in election law?” A similar screening was last conducted during the administration of ex-President Arroyo. During that screening, she asked, “Will I still lead by one million?”

Deputy presidential spokesperson Abigail Valte confirmed that election lawyers Romulo Macalintal and Sixto Brillantes were indeed in Malacañang last Monday. The President told them he was in awe of their knowledge in election law. The two lawyers returned the compliment and said they were in awe of his taste in cars.

This just in!
Senator Joker Arroyo has filed a resolution seeking to fumigate the Senate. Arroyo made the proposal after getting bitten by a “mosquito” last Wednesday.

Reacting to Senator Antonio Trillanes IV’s statement that he was the “laziest senator,” Joker Arroyo said, “Why should I be bothered by a mosquito?” Trillanes has been doing several radio and TV guestings recently. Next up: TV 5’s Face to Face.

The PAO Chief
Public Attorneys Office Chief Atty. Persida Rueda-Acosta admitted she flunked the Career Executive Service (CES) exam she took in 2003. She obtained a failing grade of 55.95 percent. To be fair to Acosta, she got a 99+ rating in the NCEE.

Defending her failing grade in the 2003 CES exam, Attorney Persida Rueda-Acosta said, “Hindi naman kasi ako nag-review eh. Subok-subok lang ‘yun. Parang katuwaan lang ‘yun.” Sa presinto ka na magpaliwanag. You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say will be used against you in a court of law.

Top Absentee
According to House records, Ilocos Sur Rep. Ronald Singson, who was charged in Hong Kong for a drug offense is the No. 1 absentee in the first six months of the 15th Congress. Following his Hong Kong arrest in July 2010, Singson has failed to attend any “session” – Congressional, or otherwise.

Overseas…

Raging floodwaters have swept across the state of Queensland in Australia similar to what happened in the Philippines during typhoon Ondoy in 2009. Experts say the last great flood in Australia happened a century ago… to which Sen. Juan Ponce Enrile said, “Yeah, I witnessed that. Horrible!”

Arizona Shooting
Jared Loughner, the 22-year-old man accused in a Tucson, Arizona shooting spree that left six people dead and a U.S. Congresswoman clinging to life initially refused to speak with authorities. But Loughner had an apparent change of mind when Tucson police told him, “If you don’t cooperate, we’ll send you to Tondo, Manila.”

In Showbiz: Mega Scene
Sharon Cuneta tripped and fell down flat on her buttocks while taping a birthday concert at the Big Dome stage last Tuesday. Cuneta’s husband, Sen. Francis Pangilinan says the megastar is now okay. He didn’t give any update though on the condition of the stage.
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“Feeling good about the government is like looking on the bright side of any catastrophe. When you quit looking on the bright side, the catastrophe is still there.”
~ P. J. O’Rourke

Survey Says
Sakaling magsara ang Facebook, ano ang mararamdaman mo?
– Hindi ko kayang tanggapin! ‘Yon na nga lang ang happiness ko. 17.43%
– Oks lang. May Twitter naman. ‘Tsaka remember, buhay pa si Friendster! 25.69%
– Hindi kawalan sa ‘kin ang social networking sites! 56.88%

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Have a great weekend. Ingat!





TROUBLES

9 01 2011


Black Nazarene
Quiapo District in Manila is celebrating the 404th anniversary of the arrival of the Black Nazarene in the Philippines. Yup, it’s been that long. In fact, Senator Juan Ponce Enrile was still an infant when the image was brought in here.

Thousands of Roman Catholic devotees joined the annual procession of the Black Nazarene Sunday. Sketchy reports say among those who were spotted in the sea of people were known Nazarene devotee Noli De Castro who prayed for his health, and first time procession participant Atty. Persida Rueda-Acosta who prayed for her job.

The PAO Chief
President Aquino is maintaining a hands-off stance on the case of embattled Public Attorney’s Office Chief Persida Rueda-Acosta. The president admits though it would have been much easier for him to decide on Acosta’s fate if she was a weather forecaster.

Mar Roxas Back Soon?
President Aquino announced Friday he’s eyeing former senator and defeated vice presidential candidate Mar Roxas to be his “chief troubleshooter.” Roxas’ first task is to troubleshoot problems that may arise from his appointment.

Defeated vice presidential candidate Mar Roxas is being eyed as President Aquino’s “chief troubleshooter.” Palace insiders deny rumors that the post will be created to neutralize Rico E. Puno, currently, President Aquino’s “chief troublemaker.”


Angry Bird
Four police officers from Zamboanga City were injured when a flightless cassowary bird attacked them. The bird was subsequently captured but insisted during the interrogation that he acted on self-defense saying the cops attempted to kidnap him.

A 4-foot cassowary bird attacked a group of policemen in training in Zamboanga City. After the “encounter,” the police captured the bird. In a related story, the Communist Party of the Philippines is demanding the release of the bird before peace talks with the government could push through.


Dumb Criminal
Authorities have captured Arnel Buenaflor, the gunman in the fatal shooting of a Kalookan City councilman recently. In fairness to Buenaflor, he didn’t resist arrest. In fact, he gamely posed when his mugshots were taken.
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“Trouble springs from idleness.”
~Benjamin Franklin


Fun!
As I have mentioned in my previous posts, every Saturday night, I moderate a game on Twitter. It’s open to the public. You just have to follow me. Last night, I asked tweeples to send “Perfect Movie Casting Choices.” Examples: (1) Madam Auring & Ellen Lising: Face/Off (2) Sen. Panfilo Lacson: Catch Me If You Can, (3) Sen. Lito Lapid: Artificial Intelligence (4) ex-Sen. Jamby Madrigal: Girl, Interrupted, (5) Luneta Tourist Bus: Journey to the Center of the Earth, and (6) Former VP Teofisto Guingona and former Sen. Jovito Salonga: 10,000 BC.

In no particular order, here are some of the funniest entries that were tweeted and re-tweeted last night (January 8):
1: From @angeldirecto – Presidential Communications Group: Clueless
2: From @forg9587 – President Aquino: Never Been Kissed
3: From @gudboyARL – President Aquino and Usec. Rico E. Puno: Maging Sino ka Man
4: From @paopaoAJ – Former President GMA: Dwarfina
5: From @dondeekenz – Executive Secretary Ochoa: The Drunken Master
6: From @AbigailLimHo – President Aquino: The Accidental Hero
7: From @andmyfaceislike – Rico Puno, MPD, Mayor Lim, Mendoza: Meet the Fockers
8: From @MangBurns – VP Jojo Binay: The Dark Knight
9: From @retireQuinito – Cong. Gloria M. Arroyo: Bakit Ako Mahihiya
10: From @desoleboy – Shalani Soledad: He’s Just Not That Into You
11: From @MangBurns – Kris Aquino: Scream I, II, III & IV
12: From @copochax – Shalani Soledad and Willie Revillame: The Hottie and the Nottie
13: From @forg9587 – ABS CBN Execs and Willie Revillame: Babangon Ako’t Dudurugin Kita
14: From @ronacious – Rico E. Puno and ES Jojo Ochoa: The Untouchables
15: From @whoisJeffD – Ping Lacson: Gone With the Wind
16: From @forg9587 – Mar Roxas: Abot-Kamay Ang Pangarap
17: From @dexdixidexy – President Aquino, Kris Aquino and Liz Uy: Chronicles of Narnia: The Lion, The Witch and The Wardrobe (Named as funniest entry of the evening)
18: From @hybridcha – Hitmakers of ‘Pilipinas Win na Win:’ Gone Too Soon
19: From @CamBon0620 – John Lloyd Cruz & Shaina Magdayao: Teeth
20: From @gudboyARL – Mar & Korina: An Inconvenient Truth
21: From @paopaoAJ – Jason and Hubert Webb: Ang Utol Kong Hoodlum
22: From @instantsiomai – President Aquino /Liz Uy: How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days
23: From @Ro_nnie – GMA: Once Upon a Time in China
24: From @magzcafe – Assunta de Rossi: Bride of Chuckie
25: From @AbigailLimHo – GMA and Mike Arroyo: Bonnie and Clyde
26: From @dexdixidexy – Ai Ai de las Alas: Bagong Buwan
27: From @MangBurns – Sharon Cuneta: Titanic
28: From @MangBurns – Gretchen Fullido: Titanic II
29: From @toppgarperio – GMA: Despicable Me
30: From @yourarcilicious – GMA: Leprechaun
31: From @Harr1etTheSpy – Kris: Anakan Mo Ako
32: From @instantsiomai – Ronald Singson: Life is Hot in Cracktown
33: From @Harr1etTheSpy – Secs. Coloma/Carandang and Donald Tsang: The Ring
34: From @dexdixidexy – Kris and James: Ang Darling Kong Aswang
35: From @MangBurns – Senate President Enrile: Twilight
36: From @tinniewanders – Madam Auring: The Mummy (Or The Thing)
37: From @Harr1etTheSpy – GMA: Unforgiven
38: From @ktinnbautista – Willie and Shalani: Lust, Caution
39: From @johnearlm – Ronald Singson: Bawal na Gamot
40: From @ronacious – Sharon Cuneta: Bounce
41: From @kimopulido – Gladys Reyes: Jaws; Toni Gonzaga: Jaws 2!
42: From @forg9587 – P-Noy’s Cabinet: Up In The Air
43: From @chinofigueroa – Mommy Dionisia & Madame Auring: Alien vs. Predator
44: From @scuzzzy – PAO’s Atty. Persida Acosta: Paano na Kaya?
45: From @attyarj – Jessica Alfaro & Hubert Webb et al: I Know What You Did Last Summer
46: From @chuckieboii – Joel Cruz: Scent of a Woman
47: From @johnearlm – Kuya Germs: Insomnia
48: From @dexdixidexy – PNoy, Korina, Shalani, Liz: Ghost of Girlfriends Past
49: From @lexiz08 – Exec. Sec. Ochoa: The Hangover
50: From @one_lad – Generals Delfin Bangit and Jesus Versoza: Cop Out
51: From @angeldirecto – Shalani Soledad, Pnoy, & Len Lopez: Una Kang Naging Akin
52: From @chuckieboii – Madam Auring: Dalaw (or the lack of it)
53: From @Harr1etTheSpy – Korina Sanchez: Hairspray
54: From @angeldirecto – President Aquino: I Am Sam
55: From @klaris – Presidential Communications Group: Babel
56: From @8muggler – Mai Mislang: The Motorcycle Diaries
57: From @angeldirecto – Annabelle Rama, Daisy Romualdez, Amalia Fuentes: Mean Girls
58: From @maharanirish – Vina Morales:The Wrestler
59: From @Pimply_PonC – Mar Roxas: The Back-up Plan
60: From @inanperillo – VP Jojo Binay: Out of Africa
61: From @yourarcilicious – Madame Auring: House of Wax
62: From @attyarj – Ex-Gen. Carlos Garcia: Indecent Proposal
63: From @Ivee – DOT Sec. Alberto Lim & the “Pilipinas Kay Ganda” Campaign: Failure to Launch
64: From @attyarj – Madam Auring: Huwag Mong Buhayin ang Bangkay
65: From @hfamous – Mar & Korina: A Series of Unfortunate Events
66: From @forg9587 – Anna Dizon: Bituing Walang Ningning
67: From @jayspogi – Atty. Persida Acosta: Kakabakaba Ka Ba?
68: From @dexdixidexy – PNoy: Palimos ng Pag-ibig
69: From @jayspogi – Juan Ponce Enrile: Ice Age 4
70: From @paopaoAJ – Dyan Castillejo and Mommy Dionisia Pacquiao: Magkapatid

Whether you’re active or not on Twitter as long as you have an account, log in every Saturday evening between 9 and 11:30. Let’s have fun – for free.

Survey Says
Dapat bang gawing mandatory ang drug testing sa mga miyembro ng Senado at Kamara?
– OO. Dapat lang. 91.69%
– Siguro, voluntary, pabor ako. 6.23%
– Hindi na kailangan ang drug test. 2.08%

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Have a great week ahead! #teamlakers #beattheheat








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