RUMORS, FACTS, AND HUMOR IV

13 10 2012

HERE’S PART 4 of our list of baseless and unfounded bits of information on or about political figures, government officials, and organizations in the Philippines.

106: From kindergarten to college, Ralph Recto was a scholar of Philip Morris Philippines Incorporated.

107: Tito Sotto is allergic to latex condoms.

108: Jejomar Binay has not lost an election since he first ran as president of his class in Grade III.

109: Editors and writers of UST’s The Varsitarian were each given a certificate of commendation by the UST administration for their recent editorial against the RH Bill, and the pro-RH bill professors of Ateneo and La Salle.

110: There are more Akbayan members than Liberals in the Aquino administration.

111. Alfredo Lim is more popular on Twitter than in Manila.

112: Edgardo Angara, the main author of the TRO’d Cybercrime Prevention Act doesn’t know the meaning of ‘e’ in e-mail and the ‘com’ in dot com.

113: Aside from target shooting, President Aquino is also good at 1-2-3 Pass!

114: Anignat Tpurroc, a Guatemalan-based psychic of Mayan descent predicts the Freedom of Information bill will be finally passed by Philippine Congress in 2061.

115: The blockbuster film ‘The Mistress’ was loosely based on the personal experience of an incumbent senator.


116: According to his high school yearbook, Jack Enrile was voted “Most Likely to Win an Election Because of His Last Name.”

117: Ernesto Maceda is the person behind a hugely popular parody account on Twitter.

118: Nightly lotto draws are not conducted LIVE. All draws are pretaped. Winning numbers are pre-drawn. Winners are pre-determined.

119: Congressional candidate Annabelle Rama could write in Cebuano with one hand, and invectives with the other hand at the same time.

120: (By choice) Korina Sanchez has not set foot in Makati City since the vice presidential defeat of Mar Roxas in 2010.


121: Junjun Binay was rejected by German Moreno when he auditioned for the defunct youth-oriented show ‘That’s Entertainment.’

122: Jovito Salonga and Juan Ponce Enrile still communicate with each other using Baybayin (Alibata).

123: PLDT/Smart big boss Manny V. Pangilinan is also a Globe postpaid subscriber. His subscriber name is Jude Edmund A. Demayo, and his cell number is 0916-7538-MVP.

124: A confidential survey on the party-list system in the Philippines showed party-list groups joined the elections due to these reasons: pork barrel (85%); power and influence (5%); fame (2%), and “Secret! Walang clue!” (8%).

125: Miriam Defensor-Santiago was present when Heart Evangelista said ‘Yes’ to Chiz Escudero.


126: As of Friday, official records show Richard Gomez’ huge image appears on at least 156 billboards in Lucy Torres’ congressional district in Leyte.

127: Vice gubernatorial hopeful Jinkee Pacquiao can neither spell nor pronounce ‘vice gubernatorial.’

128: Mikey Arroyo was Jeremy Renner’s stunt double in ‘The Bourne Legacy.’

129: At least 12 councilors in Quezon City have Herbert Bautista’s initials (HB) tattooed just below their navels.

130: A sealion is featured on the Seal of the President of the Philippines while a Philippine crocodile is featured on the seal of the House of Representatives.

For those who missed:
Rumors, Facts and Humor 1-50
Rumors, Facts and Humor 51-80
Rumors, Facts, and Humor 81-105
—————————————-
“The brain may die, but my compulsion for useless trivia lives on.”
― Molly Harper, Nice Girls Don’t Have Fangs

Quote of the Day
“It’s not about passing a sin tax law. It is about passing a sin tax measure at the effective and proper rates. Otherwise, we’re just fooling each other.”
~Former senator Juan Flavier on Ralph Recto’s version of the Sin Tax bill

Happy weekend!

I am on Twitter: @HecklerForever.

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13 responses

14 10 2012
senior60

ako ay hindi naniniwala na pag magmahal ang presyo ng sigarilyo ang mga naninigarilyo ay hindi na or magbawas na ng number of cigarettes to smoke in a day, ang mga maka afford ay hindi natatakot magka cancer, ang hindi maka afford ay pipilitin at pipilitin na maka …..

14 10 2012
Timow

106. On the other hand, Robert Balir Carabuena failed in the psychological exams in the said company.
114. I see what you did there. (Hint: baligtaran ang pangalan niya)
118. Nightly major lotto draws are not sorted LIVE. [Sorting in ascending order from 6/42 to 6/55, as if it is displayed in the ticket, does not affect the result and lessens confusion.]
127. Nor was Aling Dionisa nor her husband, Ninong Manny.
130. Si Lolong po ba yan? OK, paano yung Senado?

* * * * * * * * * *
Ibalik si Juan Flavier bilang DOH Secretary! Move over, Sen. Recto, he’s a-comin’ your way.

14 10 2012
Libertas

Heart evangalista to change her name to Electra
Escudero to change his name to Uncle Dom

P-noy to play Mr Bean in malacanan xmas panto.
Ralph rectum will entertain by blowing $ smoke rings from his ass

14 10 2012
Libertas

Philippine daily inquirer appointed spin doctor for ‘bum’ aquinos senatorial bid.

CJ sereno makes the spanish inquisition seem impartial.

All congressmen/senators who take bribes from tobacco companies, ( we all know about the ‘brown envelopes’ at the end of committee meetings) should be charged with assisted murder.

14 10 2012
Libertas

Jinkee pacquiao is to politics what lito lapid is to.. anything

Manny pacquiao is to politics.. what chavit singson says

14 10 2012
Anonymous

heart closes her eyes and pretend chiz is jericho when he kisses her

15 10 2012
jdcgzm

I would like to see the notes of Enrile and Salonga in Baybayin! :D

15 10 2012
aiken

eto palagay ko na effective solution to political dynasty — pag running for second term, total votes should be divided by 2, pag third term, divided by 3.. pag napanalo mo eleksyon, ibig sabihin, gusto ka talaga ng tao.. kahit sampung beses ka pa tumakbo, basta Nth term divide by N

15 10 2012
Libertas

‘Yes we can’ partylist rep in congress maynard lapid – son of senator lapid!! A thieves charter.
And no i cant find out what you even stand for.
Whats happened to the 70 million annual pork barrel. Mum taken it over to the states?

15 10 2012
Libertas

Wasn’t ralph recto known as ‘mr 15 percent’ as a congressman in his pork barrel allocation.
15% of 30 billion is… mindboggling. Nice pension if u can get it.

16 10 2012
Sam

Winner yun name nun guatemalan psychic sa 114!

2 11 2012
Anonymous

I sooo agree on item #111 !

19 01 2013
Pat

Walang krissy today?

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