THE EPAL QUIZ III

10 09 2012

IT’S FULFILLING to hear that politicians are responding ‘positively’ to the anti-epal campaign of groups like Epal Watch, Tao Po, and of course, the vigilant public.

Last week, President Aquino ordered the removal of streamers, banners, posters and billboards bearing his and his allies’ huge faces. Manila Mayor Alfredo Lim followed suit. TESDA Secretary-General Joel Villanueva has also appealed to his supporters to take down billboards with his image. Even Valenzuela City Mayor Sherwin Gatchalian and Quezon City Mayor Herbert Bautista have acted on the complaints.


“Kung gusto, may paraan; kung ayaw, maraming dahilan.’ Indeed.

With that, I present to you the third installment of our series of ‘epal’ tests: Epal Quiz III. Good luck and have fun!


1: Nakakalimutan ang magandang intensyon kung may mukhang ginagamit na tila dekorasyon. Titigan ang billboard. Ano raw ang paalala?
A: Mag-ingat daw tayo sa dalawang lalaki sa larawan. Sila ang mga lider ng ‘Basag-Kotse’ Gang!
B: Para ‘di mo solo ang batikos ng publiko, mag-2-in-1 billboard na lang tayo!
C: Kahit gaano ka kabata ngayon, makakalbo ka rin pagdating ng panahon!


2: Ano ang masasabi mo sa mataas at makintab na pangalan ni Mayor sa sementadong ‘Welcome’ sign?
A: Bongga!
B: Waley!
C: Kaloka!


3: Ayon sa larawan, gaano raw kalaki ang itatayong gusali?
A: Kasinlaki ng larawan ng kongresista!
B: I’m not sure pero parang mas malaki at mas mahaba pa rin ang pangalan ni Congressman Boyet Gonzales
C: Gaano kalaki?? Ayun o, nasa tarp: 4-storey, 8-classroom, 1 reelectionist


4: Kung ikaw ang residente ng barangay na ito sa District I, Quezon City, ano ang magiging reaksyon mo kapag nabasa mo sa streamer: “Welcome to the Covered Court of Brgy. Masambong?”
A: “Anong palagay n’yo sa ‘kin, bulag? Sa tingin n’yo, ‘di ko alam na covered court ‘yan? Kailangan talagang sabihin?!?”
B: “Ok sana ang covered court. Pero mas ok kung covered ang faces nila.”
C: “So nag-donate kayong dalawa ng pondo para itayo ang covered court?? Kayo talaga ang gumastos at hindi ang taumbayan? Hiyang-hiya naman kami sa inyo.”


5: Ano kaya ang sinasabi ng butihing alkalde ng Caloocan City?
A: “Baka sabihin n’yo, namumulitika ako. Bakit? Nakakaboto ba ang aso?”
B: “Masyadong maliit ang pangalan ko, right? Hindi n’yo mabasa nang maayos, tama? Sige, gagawan natin ng paraan!”
C: (Note: A la-Nora Aunor) “Mga hayuuup! Pumayag akong magpa-picture dahil sabi n’yo for press release, hindi pang-epal quiz! Aw-aw-awww!”


6: Anong konklusyon ang mabubuo mo batay sa nakasulat sa tarpaulin na ‘to?
A: Hindi aasenso ang Distrito Uno kung supot ang mga lalaki rito.
B: Kung “Free Tule” ang kanyang mission, ano kaya ang kanyang vision? (Ang susunod na palabas ay Rated SPG)
C: Sa buhok pa lang at ngiti ni Konsehala, kahit tuli ka na, magpapatuli ka pa!


7: Wala na akong masabi sa councilor na ito ng QC. Kung makakasalubong mo siya, ano ang una mong itatanong?
A: “Ano ho ba ang kasalanan sa ‘yo ng gate? Bakit mo idinadamay?”
B: “Saan po kayo mas talented: sa pagiging epal o sa pagiging literal? Candy talaga ang logo?”
C: “Kung buhay pa ang taong nasa likod ng brilliant ideyang ito… bakit?”


8: Matapos pagmasdan ang malaking karatula, ano ang nais mong iparating sa gobernador ng Quezon?
A: “Sir, mawalang-galang na po. Alin ho ba ang ventilation system d’yan: ‘yong green o ‘yong gray?”
B: “Alam n’yo Gov, may something in common ang karatulang ito at ang project ninyo: mahangin.”
C: “Sige nga po, patunayan n’yo ngang umaandar ‘yan. Pumasok nga kayo sa loob…”


9: Mula sa Lungsod ng Pasay… What the hell is this?
A: Tayong Dalawa: Ang pelikulang nangahas sumabay sa showing ng ‘The Mistress’ nina John Lloyd at Bea!
B: ‘Buti na lang libre ang konsultasyon, at may libreng gamot na ipamimigay. Nasusuka kasi ako sa tarp n’yo eh!
C: Si lalaki: “Naglilingkod ng tapat” Si babae: “Nais maglingkod sa inyo… ” – Buhay na buhay pa, nagpaparamdam na!


10. Basahing mabuti ang bawat salitang nakasulat sa pader. Ano ang masasabi mo?
A: ‘Yan ba ang bagong definition ng beautification? Nakabalandra ang higanteng pangalan nina Governor at Mayor!?
B: Bago kayo umepal, alamin n’yo muna ang tamang spelling ng boulevard! Kung maka-boulibard naman kayo! Wrong spelling wrong!
C: Alin kaya ang mas mahaba, ‘yong boulibard o ‘yong pangalan ni Gov?

LET’S DO IT! Kung meron din kayong ‘candy o ‘boulibard’ epal photos, you may email me at epaliticians@yahoo.com. If someone else took the photos, please indicate the source. Thank you! (All together now… “Never knew that it would go so far / When you left me on that boulibard”

Quote of the Day
“I would rather be called epal than [be told that I’m] not doing my job.”
~TESDA Director General Joel Villanueva

Puno’s Out
Reports say embattled DILG Undersecretary Rico E. Puno is on the way out. That’s one small step for Mar, one giant leap for Balay.

Asked about the allegation that his good friend and shooting buddy Rico E. Puno could have been involved in an anomalous arms deal, President Aquino said, “There’s always the presumption of innocence until proven otherwise.” To which Renato Corona said, “Presumption of innocence your face!”

Premature
Sen. Miriam Defensor-Santiago is filing a bill against premature campaigning. And LP senatoriables were like, “O, bakit ang sama ng tingin n’yo sa amin?”

——————
“What kills the skunk is the publicity it gives itself.”
~Abraham Lincoln

Have a safe and productive week!

I am on Twitter: @HecklerForever.

For the images used here, thank you so much:
Epal Watch, NoMoreEpal (FB), @bloggermom, @vtlazatin, @ninaterol, @marie_flor, @paulopadi, @Simply_Clinton, Boy Pinoy, Oliver Ocampo, Donna Azaña, and Arnel Aransanzo.

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53 responses

10 09 2012
olops001

Dahil sa nabasa kong ito, gusto ko na rin mag submit ng photo. Meron kasi dito sa Tarlac eh ang laki ng pintura ng name ni President Aquino

12 09 2012
etchosera

Ah okey!

NEXT!

10 09 2012
Libertas

epal – power to the people.

Punogate
Even a trainee cop could spot more holes in the p-noy/de lima cover up story than in a piece of swiss emmental cheese.

FG Puno starting to make FG arroyo look good.

The ‘blood brothers’ of hacienda luisita protecting each other.

Putting a corrupt arms dealer in charge of a billion peso contract is like leaving an alcoholic in charge of a bar.

Bet Mar Roxas wont let Puno organise his air travel

10 09 2012
Gigi

Ang problema, politicians will now use the same modus operandi as Villar Foundation. Or at least the very rich politicians. You should write a satire about this foundation also.

12 09 2012
ricky

Correct ka jan Gigi. Villar is one of the most corrupt politician ever.

10 09 2012
ricky

“Hindi aasenso ang Distrito Uno kung supot ang mga lalaki rito.” – hahaha! Panalo!

10 09 2012
dolagarcia

Reblogged this on Dola The Explorer.

10 09 2012
Libertas

“Demoralize the enemy from within by surprise,
terror, sabotage, assassination”
Adolf Hitler

Add misinformation, a code of silence, and dishonor amongst thieves and journalists, and you can make the people think black is white, dark men are evil spirits, and secrecy is transparency.

sieg heil

10 09 2012
Anonymous

Great reminders! for “Epal Politicians” and the like.. do your job as a public servant not a publicity cum celebrity campaign on your part! Kudos for this brilliant tweets to spell the difference of “May Pakialam ka at may magagawa ka sa Ikabubuti ng lahat sa atin–sa Pilipinas Kong Mahal..!:)

10 09 2012
Libertas

Grandfathers day yesterday.
My grandfather was fighting against hitler whilst aquino’s grandfather was commiting treason by helping the japanese.
No wonder this is deleted from the brand image.
And no wonder the real family values are a self created myth.
Straight path. Bent as a corkscrew.

12 09 2012
senior60

hindi nga

10 09 2012
big george

it just keeps getting better… natawa ako ng husto sa #6… congrats at tumatalab kahit papaano ang efforts to eradicate epals… keep it up…

10 09 2012
Libertas

Just discovered the UK Government/ ministry of defence banned, and punished, IMI – puno’s chosen arms supplier – for gross contract violation and corruption. Ref. UK Daily Mail.

This is a can of worms.
No wonder they are trying so hard to keep the lid on it.

i hope santiago’s research is more thorough than sottos. its all there for those who want the truth

12 09 2012
senior60

true? just like your other post about a British Member of Parliament being robbed in her hotel room? the latter i only heard from you

13 09 2012
Libertas

@senior60

“A visiting member of the British parliament
reported the loss of her purse and credit
cards in a hotel room in Quezon City……”
Inquirer 2 sep 2012

Please read the papers or check google than insinuate i lied.

16 09 2012
senior60

yes libertas slight haha

i already admitted that i don’t buy newspaper anymore and i am not good at goggling but anyway i will try to get hold of that issue and whenever that will be i will either say sorry for insinuating or you really lied

you can’t fault me because i haven’t heard that news in 24 oras or maybe i was absent when that was broadcasted hehe

in the meantime, peace

10 09 2012
Angry Bird (@AngryBird1905)

hahaha wtg! ROFL ako sa #6

10 09 2012
Mang Tasyo

Bahay Toro? Operation Tuli? Talaga namang fertile ground para sa mga kagaya mo, he he he.

A: Hindi aasenso ang Distrito Uno kung supot ang mga lalaki rito.
B: Kung “Free Tule” ang kanyang mission, ano kaya ang kanyang vision? (Ang susunod na palabas ay Rated SPG)
C: Sa buhok pa lang at ngiti ni Konsehala, kahit tuli ka na, magpapatuli ka pa!

Walang itulak-kabigin!

10 09 2012
Bituing marikit

Keep ‘em coming at epal quiz,we may yet have uncluttered surroundings before election campaign starts.well,as for the pathetic Tito sotto,I wonder what his colleagues at the senate have in mind about him.eeew!!!

11 09 2012
jasper

#6. fine print near bottom fold of tarp – bawal bata sa libre tule. kailangan of voting age

11 09 2012
PH Republiq

sir, pansin ko lang, may morning show pala na LiberalTV sa ABS-CBN! 8AM to 9AM, Mondays thru Fridays. Watch na Kapamilya!

11 09 2012
anonymous

dito sa iloilo city kalalabas lang ng bagong city hall employees ID na nakabalandra yung mukha ni mayor jed mabilog. whew! EPALLLLLLLLLLL

11 09 2012
elmo

what the HECK…. you really are a PRO! sinner or saint? to the people, you are heaven sent, to the politicians…. they are finding ways to send you to hell!!! through your humble works, people realized that the mathematical equation POLITICS = SHOWBIZ is true! keep up the good work, may you be bless w/ more wisdom and quick reflexes to dodge blazing bullets!

11 09 2012
Timow

Again, part 3, todo na to!
1) A, [Beware of two guys for being EPAL, reward: a boot from getting reelected.]
2) B, [The response says so.]
3) C, [Specification and technicality at it's best.]
4) A or C [It's all in a common sense.]
5) A
6) B
7) C
8) A
9) B
10) B

* * * * * * * * * *
It’s about damn right to give DILG USec. Puno a boot. “Usec, you’re no Jesse Robredo!”

* * * * * * * * * *
I humbly apologize to the original and real Libertas, the star and Mensa commenter of this WordPress.

12 09 2012
Libertas

apology accepted. even if sarcastic.
not here to diss fellow commenters
PH the star
cheers

11 09 2012
Renosan

May epal din po sa amin. Ang nakalagay sa Tarp ay “Gov. Cagas Cares” pero dahil halatang umeepal ang dapat na basa ay “Gov. Caga-Scares” . he he.

12 09 2012
etchosera

Bwahahahaha!

Ayyyy! Tama po ba ang reaction ko?

13 09 2012
lowela

hahaha… etchosera ka talaga! panalo ang Bwahahaha mo…

11 09 2012
Anonymous

Mas magkakaroon po ng saysay kung mismong Comelec at DILG ang ating tatawagin ang atensyon regarding sa isyu ng mga epal politicians. – Cris Ibarra

13 09 2012
professionalheckler

Haven’t you read the news? Because of the anti-epal campaign, the Comelec has took notice and has spoken on the issue. Thanks.

17 09 2012
JVD

And this is how we start change. Keep it coming. Who knows baka mahiya na sila mangampanya sa eleksyon dahil baka mabansagan na epal

11 09 2012
checkmate

nyahaha kulet nung bading saka tuli

siguro madali ding makakita ng ganyan, pag may natiyempuhan ako har har har ^_^

11 09 2012
none

maganda to.. sana mag trending to sa mga blogs.. pa picture sa mga tarp and signs na nakabalandra ang pagmumukha ng mga kupsy na politiko.. nyahahahahaha..

11 09 2012
Anonymous

NAG-BA-BOUNCE PO YUNG EMAIL NA BINIGAY NYO. IT DOES NOT EXIST DAW YUNG epaliticians@yahoo.com . Baka pwede kayong magbigay pa ng ibang email kung san kami pwede mag submit

13 09 2012
professionalheckler

it’s working na. fixed! thanks. :))

11 09 2012
lucent

heckler you should also look into this site (kotongwatch –>https://kotongwatch.crowdmap.com/ ), kotong policemen should be eliminated as well

i don’t trust this tesda secretary, nandun pa rin ang epal nyang mukha sa harap ng tesda eh

11 09 2012
em

part III na wala paring makati???

13 09 2012
professionalheckler

it will be on part 4 and i’d appreciate if you could send me photos of epaliticians from makati. contribute something. thanks.

13 09 2012
anonymous

pls don’t leave out iloilo city subrang EPAL mayor dito!

11 09 2012
samuelle clemens

C: Sa buhok pa lang at ngiti ni Konsehala, kahit tuli ka na, magpapatuli ka pa
ahahah. panalo ka talaga

12 09 2012
senior60

2. Kaloka! ang palayaw ni mayor

12 09 2012
senior60

8. sinama mo pa ang ventilation system, hindi naman sila halata

12 09 2012
senior60

6. habang lumalaon, ang pangalan ng mga barangay ay nagiging mga
walang kwenta

10. hanggang ngayon, nandyan pa yan mula sa kapanahunan ni cory?

tungkol sa mga spellingspelling na yan, kadalasan talaga nangyayari
at yan ay kasalanan na ng mga taga print/gawa at kung bakit kasi hindi
ipa correct

12 09 2012
DonQC06

Grabe si villanueva eh tungkulin nman talaga nila ang maglingkod hindi na nila kailangan pang ibalandra mukha nila. Jusme.

12 09 2012
Libertas

Credit to PH and others for epal stance.
Lets hope it maintains its momentum and impact, and expands – election watch 2013.
One voice can be more powerful than one vote. And better still – use both.

12 09 2012
Libertas

Am sure confusion is part of the strategy , but am confused who is sleeping with who – politically speaking. We know p-noy sleeps with no-one!
Samar, balay, times street, and puno introducing his allegiance to tarlac faction.
Is anyone for the people!!

12 09 2012
Angry Bird (@AngryBird1905)

ay matanong ko lang. kelan ba simula ng election? ala akong alam haha. obviously marami na nangangampanya, i saw Annabelle Rama’s FB at nakikiapgkamay na sya sa kung saan saang baranggay…hmmm

13 09 2012
Mark

Sa day off ko pi-picturan ko ang mga kaululan na ginawa sa Echeveri Ville. Naging isang malaking scrap book ang caloocan.

14 09 2012
listir

dami talagang epal

15 09 2012
Len-len Cruise

may nakita ako naiibang epal talunan na politician maagang nag lagay ng tarp nya for 2013 election.. mamaya pipicturan kita at ma ipost din

21 09 2012
rojan88

hahahaha. ang kulet nung boulibard. hahahahaha. the best ka talaga idol. sana gawan mo rin ang laguna, dami rin epal dun. tweet ko sayo pics nila, hehehee.

21 09 2012
Jimmy Leaño

tawa ako to the max ph kasi nakakawala ng stress hahahahahah. but seriously ang anti epal campaign is gaining ground….. sana itigil na ng mga politico ang gawain kaepalan !!!!!!!!

2 10 2012
Anonymous

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[ᴄᴏᴍᴍᴇɴᴛ ʙʟᴏᴄᴋᴇᴅ.] (ʀᴀ ɴᴏ. 10175)

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