ONDOY’S ONSLAUGHT

28 09 2009

Warning: Due to the latest tragedy that struck the country, The Professional Heckler will not be in his usual mean (and funny) self. Apologies.

APTOPIX Philippines Flooding Exodus
Concerned for their survival, one by one, hopeless and worried people started leaving. They were trying to save themselves. Nope, I’m not talking about typhoon victims. I’m referring to members of Lakas CMD-Kampi.

Philippines Flooding Record-Breaking
Weather specialists were stunned at the volume of water brought by tropical storm Ondoy. So powerful was the storm that Bayani Fernando was finally forced to come out of his weeklong seclusion.

Philippines Flooding Devastation
According to news reports, because typhoon Ondoy has caused massive destruction in the country, PAGASA might delete the typhoon’s name from the official list of future weather disturbances in the country. In bigger news, the National Historical Institute is studying if it could delete the names Marcos, Estrada, and Arroyo in the official list of Philippine presidents.


Several political personalities and controversial celebrities reportedly used Twitter to express their thoughts on this latest tragedy. Here are samples of unverified posted tweets.

President Arroyo: “Sabi nila knee-deep lang!? It was chest-deep! Puñeta!”
about 34 hours ago from web

Sen. Mar Roxas: “Ramdam ko kayo. Promise, totoo na ‘yan.”
about 12 hours ago from web

Sen. Manuel Villar: “I am worried about C5 road.”
4:30 AM Sep 25th from web

Sen. Noynoy Aquino: “Will have to meet with the Pink Sisters before deciding on which evacuation center to visit first.”
about 28 hours ago from twitterfeed

Cebu Rep. Antonio Cuenco: “Half of the members of the Lower House will join Noynoy’s planned relief drive.”
about 30 hours ago from web

Sen. Panfilo Lacson: “God Save the Philippines from typhoon Ondoy!”
5:30 PM Sep 25th from UberTwitter

Sen. Jinggoy Estrada: “Baka akala mo porke’t bumagyo, nakalimot na ako. Hindi pa tayo tapos Mr. Panfilo Morena Lacson.”
10 seconds ago from web

Bro. Mike Velarde: “Baligtarin n’yo ang inyong mga payong! Tikatik, liglig, at umaapaw na… ang baha!”
10 AM Sep 25 from Uber Twitter

Pampanga Rep. Mike Arroyo: “My advice sa mga nawalan ng bahay at gamit: pakasal ulit kayo para may magregalo sa inyo.”
2 seconds ago from web

NPA leader Ka Roger Rosal: “Basang-basa dahil sa bagyo at nanginginig sa sobrang lamig. Ka Joma, kung nababasa mo ‘to, magli-leave ako for one week!”
1900 hrs Sep 25 from mobile phone

Vicki Belo: “Just got home after driving around the metro. Ang daming nagkalat na plastic.”
about 27 hours ago from web

Kris Aquino: “Gosh, did you see Marikina and Cainta? I swear, kailangan nila ng makeover!”
about 30 hours ago from web

Annabelle Rama: “May nagtext sa ‘kin dong. Kasabwat ni Ondoy si Wilma Galvante dong!”
3 minutes ago from web

Korina Sanchez: “Rain or shine, tuloy ang kasal!”
7:30 PM Sep 25th from twitterfeed

Headline of the Weak:
hataw
___________
“Often it takes some calamity to make us live in the present. Then suddenly we wake up and see all the mistakes we have made.”
~ Bill Watterson

Elsewhere…
Philippine Daily InquirerWorst floods in the Philippines

GMA News.TVList of verified relief centers for ‘Ondoy’ victims

27092009418 Personal: I Survived!
This street in Makati City used to be submerged in chest-deep floodwaters – the first time it happened in eons! I had to wade through it last Saturday night before three men pushing a tryke-kuliglig hybrid vehicle offered me a 300-peso(!) ride to our house at the end of the road. Two monoblock chairs were placed on the sidecar so i could stand on them. I had to raise my hands (a la-Pacquiao holding his WBC belt) to protect my bag with laptop. Para akong santong ipinaparada sa binagyong fluvial procession! Kulang na lang may magsabit sa ‘kin ng dried everlasting. It was Bocaue Pagoda tragedy meets MMFF Parade of Stars meets Manny Pacquiao victory motorcade! Insane! Ganito kami sa Makati, paano pa kaya ‘yung mga taga-Cainta at Marikina City?

Take care everyone!

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72 responses

28 09 2009
Mindanaoan

Eto — what can you say about this picture?

RT @mlq3 Rep. Mikey Arroyo getting relief goods at Rustan’s http://tinyurl.com/yaryowy — WHATTT??? WHEN WAS THIS TAKEN?!?!

28 09 2009
shynyrd

i thought your not going to be mean. maninibago na sana ako eh..

madami na daw po kasi buwaya na nakaupo, kaya yung tubig na ung pumunta sa lungsod, baka kasi naninibago na yung mga buwaya na masyadong malinis ang kanilang lungga.

God bless us all…

28 09 2009
28 09 2009
larry leviste

WHAT if it rains of KORING’S bridal parade ?

28 09 2009
lababo

wala akong balita tungkol dito, ngayon pa lang ako naga-update. Sana magpakitang gilas na ngayon ang mga pulitiko. Now is the time. At wag silang humingi ng kapalit, gawin nila dahil trabaho nila yun, it’s their f**king job to serve the people!!!

Next project nila: our drainage system.

28 09 2009
mikay

The Mikey Arroyo picture was allegedly taken during the height of Typhoon Ondoy. Please verify.

28 09 2009
mbw

i guess rain or shine…kulog o kidlat…you’re still the best heckler, heckler!

28 09 2009
maniningil

pwede na ba nating singilin kay GMA yung ginamit nyang emergency fund nung magkulang ang budget nila sa new york at sa iba pa nyang travels abroad??? ha? ha? haller!!!!

28 09 2009
Worried Pinoy

T@ng ina, wala akong nabalitaan sa maski isang presidentiable na nagbigay ng tulong. T@ng ina talaga. Dont say Gibo is an excuse, he should be doing his job as the Current Defense Secretary in the first place! T@ng ina talaga! I even read on twitter that a Senator was leaving for Cebu today for a meeting with HEALTH WORKERS??!! Bullshit!!! WE NEED YOUR HELP HERE IN MANILA! NOT IN CEBU!!! punyeta talaga!

28 09 2009
mountaintop experience

i don’t think it is the presidentiables’ duties to help. i suppose sasabihin mong namumulitika lang sila kapag nakita mo silang tumutulong sa mga nasalanta.

28 09 2009
lababo

meron ata.. I saw a picture of a styro-packed meal labeled “tulong mula kay Manny Villar”

astig no. bagyong bagyo, kampanya pa rin. Sana lang wag nilang isumbat ang tulong na ito at humingi ng kapalit na iboto sila in return.
sana rin, sa mga kababayan nating botante, hindi ito gawing batayan ng pagboto, dahil hindi talaga.

30 09 2009
kate

Sa akin okey lang kahit punuin pa ni Villar ng pangalan nya yung bag or styro dahil nung time nakailangan ng food ay may naibigay sya sa mga nagugutom.

28 09 2009
noelle Sarao

actually worried pinoy…dahil sa simpleng stickers at name ni senator villar sa mga styro na ipinamigay ay binabatikos na siya kasi nangangampanya na…and now you are saying wala pa silang tulong…

ang nakaksakit ng loob is yung mga wala pang ginawang step to give even the tiniest help e sila pa yung nagbigay kulay dun sa sticker na yon…na according to the team of senator villar ay galing sa isang niya supporter.

ngayon san lalagay ang mga presidentiables na tumutulong kung sa bawat galaw nila laging mali…konti encouragement man lang kahit para doon sa mga volunteers ni senator…

n_n

30 09 2009
Worried Pinoy

I agree on that Noelle. Wala akong pakialam kahit pati ang tinapay or ang kanin eh nakabalot sa sticker ng mukhang ng kung sino mang kandidato, ang importante tumulong sila. Before this tragedy happened, daig pa ang bakla ng mga presidentiable na to sa sobrang ingay, pero ngayon, asan sila??

On more thing, United Nations and other countries pledged and sent out money for our country. This huge sum of money will be collected by Gloria and the Gang. Goodluck kung makarating to sa nangangailangan. Goodluck talaga. Kaya siguro nag pledge na din sila na ibibigay ang dalawang buwan na sweldo nila sa nasalanta ni Ondoy. Masaya nanaman ang baboy sa palasyo. Sabagay, natural habitat ng baboy ang putik…

30 09 2009
mountaintop experience

alam mo, worriedpinoy, masyado kang negatibo. hindi nakakatulong yang pagiging negative thinker mo para sa ikauunlad ng bayan.

kung gusto mong makita yung mga hinahanap mong pulitiko, buksan mo ang mga mata mo. magbasa ka sa internet, sa twitter, sa facebook, andun yung mga actions na ginagawa ng mga politicians.

manood ka ng balita para makita mo yung mga styro na ipinamimigay na may pangalan ng mga pulitiko.

at kung sa tingin mo eh ibubulsa lang ni gloria ang perang galing sa UN, ngayon pa lang eh umapila ka na sa UN.

Pero tiyak ko, wala ka rin namang gagawin eh.

28 09 2009
Ondoy | ONDOY'S ONSLAUGHT The Professional Heckler

[...] from the official list of future weather disturbances in the country. In bigger news, the National Read more Share and [...]

28 09 2009
Typhoon Ondoy Forum

We were monitoring the water height in loyola st in sampaloc manila during the rain. And it took only 1 hour to raise the water height from 10 inches to 17 inches..

Nkakainis lang kxe ung mga tao dumudura pa rin sa tubig, tapon ng yosi, at higit sa lahat ung basura at patay na daga. :(

28 09 2009
Jef

Yuck.. kadiri… KA! Arte mo!

28 09 2009
dindin

what i would give to see a picture of “santong PH”.. hehehe :) na-visualize ko! c”,)

28 09 2009
senior60

sa lagay na yan, hindi ka pa mean, but of course you

are just being funny….

28 09 2009
senior60

under the topic “sidekick”, may post doon si religiousboy

about a filipina visionary by the name of emma de guzman,

sa mga naniniwala na may himala, this is it…

28 09 2009
senior60

mean or funny, may pamatay ka naman,

your ‘take care everyone!’

28 09 2009
JORP

KORINA: Eain or shien tulyo ang kasal

LOL – akmang akam kay korina

28 09 2009
watdapak

chest deep pala,punyeta. Haha.lmao

28 09 2009
lightworker88

Haynaku, H! Your personal account (Personal: I survived!) made me burst laughing to tears. I know it’s not at all ‘funny’ but I could actually imagine how you looked like. Ok, here’s some dried everlasting for you for making it!

28 09 2009
Tizianella

I was so devastated when I saw the havoc made by the floods. My daughter and family who lives in Sucat, Paranaque are also victim of this flood and so my in-laws from Bocaue. Everytime I saw Gibo or GMA I want to puke. If not for their corruption, the dam is repaired and more rubber boats can be bought to save people. I hope the people will also start taking care of the environment after this tragedy.Huwag na sanang pumapel ang makakapal na mukha na mga magnanakaw sa gobyerno simula kay Gloria. Yung inaksay niyang pera sa biahe niya maraming magagawa para malinis ang mga ilog at dagat at lahat ng waterways para di nagkabaha ng ganung kalaki.

28 09 2009
asa-100

milagro nalang ang pagasa ng bansang ito.
patuloy tayong magdurusa at maghihirap.

28 09 2009
Abbie

Hi, Heckler!

Natawa ako sa sinabi mo na “I had to raise my hands (a la-Pacquiao holding his WBC belt) to protect my bag with laptop. Para akong santong ipinaparada sa binagyong fluvial procession!”

But good to know you are well and good.

God bless the Philippines!

28 09 2009
mrmildmanneredunlessprovoked

kaloka ang fluvial procession! well at least na save ang laptop kahit na magabyad ng 300php.

28 09 2009
marlon

in the early 70′s when it rains i would pray that it would flood the whole city, reason being is that i will sure get chocolates, apples, etc. as part of the relief goods, and the recue were be around in no time… we were then at Olongapo and they were the Americans. TODAY, my heart bleeds and i could only cry.

28 09 2009
i'm no angel

let’s all help those families affected by typhoon Ondoy in whatever way we can.

28 09 2009
HB Brod

Funny ka talaga brod… Funny… Comment lang I think the water near your place is just waist deep hehehe iba lang perspective mo :D

28 09 2009
professionalheckler

NO, IT WAS CHEST-DEEP kasi there were people wading through the waters and hanggang dibdib talaga ang tubig. That photo was taken sunday around 12 noon na. nag-recede na ang tubig. :)

28 09 2009
T.Tinio

Nakita nyo ba yung outfit ni Gloria when she was inspecting the flooded
areas in Pasig and Cainta?

Parang naka black glossy plastic trench coat with matching red/fuscha
boots with black stars!

Ang taray talaga ng lola mo, hehehe!

28 09 2009
Ginto

Ba’t si Gibo ‘di niyo po isinama dun sa mga unverified Tweets? Unfair naman. LOL.

28 09 2009
Arvin

Ulitin ko lang hehe: http://www.ellentordesillas.com/?p=7452. Can’t get over mikey arroyo looking for Hard Drinks. He should say something about this.

29 09 2009
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[...] Ondoy’s Onslaught Warning: Due to the latest tragedy that struck the country, The Professional Heckler will not be in his usual mean (and [...] [...]

29 09 2009
JohnT

Was watching TFC earlier…bakit sinasabi pa ng mga artista kung magkano ang ido-donate nila?, tulad ni Kris Aquino, Willie R etc. …bakit di na lang sila magbigay, at di na ipagsigawan pa kung magkano ang ibinigay nila!

29 09 2009
professionalheckler

i so agree!

29 09 2009
Anonymous

I think that’s to inspire others to do the same. Peace.

5 10 2009
mavakes

Pati yung pagtulong nga nung iba kailangan naka televise. I mean, kung tutulong ka, do you really need to show it off? La lang. Just a thought lang …

29 09 2009
kyle

sabi na me, may mga taong si gloria ang sisihin dahil sa bagyo at baha.

wala tayong kasalanan, tayong mga nagtatapon ng basura kung saan-saan kaya nagbara at nag-accumulate over time ang mga drainage. tsk tsk.

PAG-ASA ang may kasalanan kasi wala daw warning. Kahit ba may warning, lilikas ba ang mga tao? Eh yung as pinapa-evacuate ng Philvolcs around volcanoes pag may warning na, ayaw pa rin umalis eh.

29 09 2009
chiwee

Now that Ondoy’s aftermath caused a lot of us to contemplate on man vs. nature’s wrath, what can I say? Walang panalo ang tao sa kalikasan. Man has no other option but to live in harmony with it. Laws with good leadership should start from here.

Ke lapad lapad ng Pilipinas, ba’t nagsisikan sa syudad? Okay, dyan na tayo sa natural urban migration kasi ang business ay nasa syudad, pero bakit hindi man lang inayos ng mga mambabatas ang physical aspect ng pagplano sa mga urban areas para hindi ito mas mistulang salaula sa dami ng sprawling structures na pati riverbanks and natural low lying areas ay tatayuan pa?

Bakit pinapayagan na pati estero ay mey bahay na nakatayo?
Bakit pati gitna ng kalsada, mey barangay hall?
Bakit ginagawang basketball court ang mga lansangan?
Bakit mas marami ang kotse keysa parking areas? Bakit may mga home/lot owners na nagpa-park sa kalsada kahit mey space sila para sa garahe at ayaw itong gamitin kasi sayang daw ang space? Kung wala kang garahe, di, wag ka ng bumili ng kotse at hindi mo pag-aari ang kalye.

Bakit mey mga batas tayo kagaya ng Lina’s Law na ikaw na nga tong may-ari ng lupa na pinag-skwatan ng squatters, ikaw pa ‘tong mamumrublema kung saan mo sila i-relocate?

Bakit dadalawa lang ang rubber boats ng Marikina, e city along the river ito, always prone to flooding. Kasi, mas mura at visible ang pambili ng PINK na pintura para makita ng tao ang project keysa disaster-preparedness stuff?

Bakit hindi maayos ayos ang drainage and road systems natin ng mga LGU when they have the money to spend on Info-posters, those damned glossy tarpaulin ones hanging on every corner greeting everybody a happy valentine, graduation, merry christmas or whatever, with their dumb smiling faces printed on it?

Okay, nandyan na rin tayo sa triple ang gastos if we use underground cables instead of overhead ones, pero baket hindi man lang ito maayos ayos, kada kanto, mey meralco, mey globe, mey pldt, mey bayantel, mey street sign, mey street light…. balet kelangan kumpol kumpol ang mga poste sa lansangan, hindi na lang gawin isa, para naman lumuwag luwag ang ating mga daan?

If our leaders and lawmakers are good examples of orderliness, the people will have the conscience to follow the law and become good citizens.

If only our country were orderly enough, then maybe, nature’s wrath would have been lessened.

5 10 2009
mavakes

May punto ka jan Best. Maraming puntos actually.

I actually read a PDI article from an architect like you. He mentioned about the studies made in Marikina – the flood prone areas na di naman ni take into consideration ng mga developers and agencies concerned. Sana naman this will serve as a lesson. AT sana rin people (in some areas) should be responsible enough not to throw garbage anywhere especially on the canals.

29 09 2009
Mikololo

On headline of the week.

Wow ang galing talaga. Hangang-hanga ako. “Gorgeous Tisay, madaling labasan!” *LOL*

29 09 2009
jade

Sa San Isidro/Palanan, Makati ba yan? Taga-doon kami at talagang chest deep nga ang tubig.

29 09 2009
professionalheckler

no. near lang ‘to sa may n. garcia street and jp rizal st. across bel-air. barangay valenzuela.

29 09 2009
eyra

hala.. malapit lang pala sa dati kong office sa ventus… tsktsk…

30 09 2009
yas

winner talaga ang anabelle rama comment…goodluck pala sa blog awards…

30 09 2009
Anonymous

@ mountaintop experience…

Gordon with Red Cross on rescue and relief operations.
ERAP visiting.
GIBO warning people to stay at home so that not to clog the street with traffic
Gloria frowning during the NDCC meeting

sa internet ako halos minu-minuto at yan lang ang nakita ko, si Mr. De Quiros nga ng PDI wala ding napansin ng mga politiko ayun na rin sa mga column nya netong mga nakaraang araw. so nasaan ba talaga sila???

30 09 2009
mountaintop experience

conrad de quiros, in his latest PDI article mentions:

“Which makes me furious today about the politicians who want to exploit the misfortune of others for their ends”.

Even de quiros acknowledged that there were, indeed, politicians, who are doing relief operations.

(http://opinion.inquirer.net/inquireropinion/columns/view/20090930-227605/Three)

Ang problema lang talaga, ginagamit ang sitwasyon para sa pamumulitika.

Pero still- tumulong. Eto lang naman ang hinahanap mo, di ba?

30 09 2009
Worried Pinoy

@ mountaintop experience

Ay tumulong ba??! eh di magaling! Pero sa tingin mo ba papansinin pa ng taong bayan ang stickers at mukha ng mga kandidato mo kung wala ng laman ang sikmura nila? Do you think iintindihin pa nila ang pulitika? Hindi na po issue ang pamumulitika dito kundi SURVIVAL! Bumaba ka kase sa bundok at tignan mo totoong nagyayari dito sa kapatagan and convince me to be more positive sa pag unlad na sinasabi mo. Hindi namin kailangan ang pera dito kundi pagkain. At pasensya ka na, hindi kase naka-add sa facebook at twitter account ko ang mga presidentiables mo kaya hindi ko nasusundan ang mga pinag-gagagawa nila. PS. paki forward sakin ang email add ng UN office so I can warn them na pagkain na lang at damit ang ipadala dito. Baka sabihin mo wala akong ginagawa. Hindi pa po ako tapos maglimas ng putik sa kalsada kaya ngayon lang ako nakasagot. Pero kudos to you for doing your research and homework.

30 09 2009
mountaintop experience

@ worriedpinoy:

ngayon, lumalayo ka sa isyung sinimulan mo. :)

nung una, naghahanap ka lang ng mga pulitikong tumutulong sa calamity. and you even said that “Wala akong pakialam kahit pati ang tinapay or ang kanin eh nakabalot sa sticker ng mukhang ng kung sino mang kandidato, ang importante tumulong sila”.

ngayong sinabi sa iyo na may mga tumutulong na pulitiko eh ibabaling mo sa akin ang galit mo?

ano ba talaga ang argumento mo?

make your thoughts clear, kabayan.

30 09 2009
mountaintop experience

@worried pinoy:

Pwede kang maka contact sa UN sa pamamagitan nito:

http://www.un.org/en/contactus/

http://www.un.org/en/faq/index.shtml

1 10 2009
Worried Pinoy

@ mountaintop experience

Thanks. That will help a lot.

1 10 2009
mountaintop experience

@worried pinoy:

no problem.

siguro nagkakaiba iba tayo ng klase ng pagtulong o pagtuligsa sa mga iregularidad na nangyayari sa bansa natin pero ang importante, nagkakaisa tayo ng layunin para sa pagbabago ng bayan.

1 10 2009
Worried Pinoy

@ mountaintop experience

I agree. Mas naniniwala pa nga ako na hindi na natin kailangan ng gubyerno ngayon dahil kitang kita naman natin kung paano magtulungan ang kapwa pilipino. Ngayon ko napatunayan na hindi na umaasa sa gubyerno ang taong bayan. Sila na mismo ang nagtutulungan. Nananatiling isang institusyon na lang ng corruption ang gubyerno. Sa lang lahat ng mamamayan ay ganito mag isip katulad natin and from there, we can stablish a new life and hope para sa bansang pilipinas. Salamat sayo bro. Salamat PH!

2 10 2009
Ajeet

Hmm. Lito Banayo of Malaya seems to have reprinted your post… without giving you credit tsk tsk. Here: http://www.malaya.com.ph/oct02/edbanayo.htm

2 10 2009
professionalheckler

SIGH. What can i say? Alam natin ang totoo :) Pero, oo nga, nakakainis! Thanks for informing me.

2 10 2009
BAROK

a very blatant case of plagiarism…tsk tsk

2 10 2009
edwini

wanna sue him =)

2 10 2009
Edik

ayun. nag comment na ako sa article nya. sabi ko-

it is sad to notice that you quote in toto a portion of The Professional Heckler’s blog (http://professionalheckler.wordpress.com/2009/09/28/ondoys-onslaught/) without even acknowledging him for that. i believe you are from the media and you know the rules. now i wonder if what you wrote are truly yours.

3 10 2009
professionalheckler

thank you so much edik. i so wanted to email him but i couldn’t. inis pa rin ako sa kanya. if he was an ordinary blogger, i would have let it pass. but he’s LITO BANAYO: a seasoned journalist, an ex political adviser of a former president, and the current political adviser of a presidential aspirant (chiz). grrr!

3 10 2009
paul

It reflects Banayo’s behavioral pattern and maybe the leadership he is supporting. Stealing is the rule of their game.

5 10 2009
mavakes

Nice one Edik.

At aba, political adviser pa pala sya ni Chiz? Kaya naman pala e.

3 10 2009
dojski

near reposo ka pala, heckler?

3 10 2009
professionalheckler

yup yup!

6 10 2009
dojski

ay naku, baka nakita na kita dun. hehe. taga dun ako dati.

keep the heckling going!

4 10 2009
May

natawa ako sa twitter. modern ang twitter but the wit here is classic! Galing talaga!

4 10 2009
plagiarism and, uh, lito banayo? is that you?!

[...] up with malaya columnist and chiz-campaign-manager lito banayo, appropriating the professional heckler’s imagined tweets without so much as a by-your-leave or a thank-you?   it’s dishonest and disgraceful, and loi [...]

5 10 2009
millette burgos

Hey Heck,

Read Banayo’s apology to you: http://www.malaya.com.ph/oct06/edbanayo.htm
But personally I am disappointed with the man…should have checked before running it. Basic journalism rule: “when in doubt, check it out”. Lalo na sa cyberspace na tambak ang copy-paste brigade. LOL!!!

16 10 2009
miguel

Dapat kasi paalisin ang mga squatters sa mga esteros and floodways. They pose danger not only among themselves but also the nearby communities. Nagtatapon ng basura at mga dumi nila sa tubig na nagbabara. Ang problema kasi yung mga hinayupak na mga mayor na ayaw palayasin kasi mga botante.
Enforce the law to save lives!!!!!!

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