Surveys
Sen. Manuel Villar has topped both the latest surveys conducted by the Social Weather Stations and Pulse Asia. When Sen. Jamby Madrigal and her lawyer Ernesto Francisco Jr heard the report, they asked each other, “Haven’t we done enough?!?”
Surveys II
Sen. Manuel Villar has zoomed to the top of two surveys on presidential aspirants. Eh mamudmod ka ba naman ng mga bahay at lupa sa Wowowee, paanong ‘di ka magta-top n’yan!
Surveys III
In the latest Pulse Asia survey, Jesus is Lord founder Bro. Eddie Villanueva got only 1 percent while Father Ed Panlilio got 0.4 percent. Pulse Asia said these figures have once proven that God was trying its best to stay neutral.
Surveys IV
Presidential aspirant Mar Roxas placed 5th and 6th in the latest Pulse Asia, and SWS surveys, respectively. Alarmed by the results of the surveys, Roxas is urging Korina Sanchez to marry him this weekend.
Top 5 Unsolicited Pieces of Advice to Mar Roxas For Him to Fare Better in the Next Survey
No. 5: Do a Doy. Give way to Noynoy.
No. 4: Prove to us that you’re not part of a big show: reschedule your October 2009 wedding after the elections.
No. 3: You and Korina must stop professing your undying love for each other on TV, radio and print. She’s 45; you’re 52. Hindi kayo sina Kim at Gerald.
No. 2: Stop acting. Those kids in your political ads deliver their lines a lot better than you do. So drop the crap that “ramdam ko kayo” because we know and you know that you don’t! Bitch!
And the No. 1 unsolicited advice to Mar Roxas for him to fare better in the next survey…
Totally stop the airing of your TV ads. Anyway, they don’t say much about your accomplishments or your concrete plans for the Filipino people. And if the members of your own staff are afraid to articulate the truth, heto… makinig ka Mar: Nakakasuka ang mga TV commercials mo!
Erap Again
Deposed president Joseph Estrada will definitely run again for president in 2010. He promises to reveal in October: his picks for the Senate, his bet for VP, and his choice for First Lady.
Carlo J for Senator?
Controversial director Carlo J. Caparas is reportedly running for senator next year. Asked about his number 1 qualification, he replied, “Mas marami akong alam na English words kaysa kay Lito Lapid.”
Bizarre Behavior
An 18-year-old boy in Leon, Iloilo was arrested after he was caught in the act of having sex with a goat… to which the wife of the House Speaker said, “What’s the big deal?!? I’ve had sex with a crocodile!”
Bizarre Behavior II
An 18-year-old boy in Iloilo was nabbed after he was caught in the act of having sex with a goat. But that was nothing compared to President Arroyo who shares her bed with a vulture.
__________
“People that are really very weird can get into sensitive positions and have a tremendous impact on history.”
~Dan Quayle
wohoooo first one again here, i love this blog!
bestiality…
Erap for PRESIDENT!!! VOTE FOR HIM!!! Para matuloy na ang patok na drama antology, teleserye na “Babangon ako at dudurugin kita (Lintik lang ang walang ganti), The return of the comeback, part 2, Episode 2, Again??!. For sure tatakbo si Erap and he will definitely win. Then Villar, Roxas and all the presidentiables will run for VP for there will be an EDSA 3 (The return of the come back and returning again, part 3, Episode 3, Not Again??????!!!) and this VP will take over to continue the corruption that arroyo and Ramos started. Hay.. circle of life sa bayan ni Juan. In the end, patay pa rin ang mga puppet na mamamayan. Maybe its better to sell my vote this time para mapakinabangan naman at makalayas na bago mag election. hehehe…
Correction, Edsa 4 na. Nagkaron na ng unsuccessful Edsa 3 dati… remember?
Nice blog you’ve got here Mr. Heckler!
how about a three-way fight for presidency?
erap vs villar vs noli
medyo mahina na si mar kahit pa me korina
Anu kaya masasabi ni Mar kung mabasa nya to…???? SANA TABLAN SYA! Agree dapat ipagpaliban ang “kasal” nya kay Korina kung totoo ngang sinsero sya. Natawa ako sa #3 unsolicited advise hehehehe
That wedding and ‘ramdam’ antics pulled mar down…
and masakit man, 2010 will be a battle of popularity among the ‘masa’ rather than strength in running the country..
i thought with Mar going down, nagiisip na mga pinoy.. pero hindi pa rin lahat ng pilipino marunong magisip at pumili.. kung sino sikat, go lang! blinded by how this politicians are publicly portrayed.. puro scripted nman ng mga PR!
sino na ba ngayon ang nkpag-latag ng concrete and credible platform?
None. Besides, sabi ni Binay sa TV Ad nya, ang gagawin pa lang daw ng mga pulitiko eh nagawa na nya so I guess di na kailangan ng platform for them. Platform for silent and responsible corruption siguro pwede pa. hehehe…
Thanks Smiley for the correction. Sensya na. hehehe…
Ouch. Bato-bato sa langit, ang tamaan huwag magalit.
Croc and vulture… BWAHAHAHAH!!!
…..i love it!!! derecho, prangkahan, parang dinuo-duro mo na si Mar dito….. ‘pag kalaban ang nanalo, Mar might as well buy a radio station for Korina kasi baka pati ABS-CBN di ma-take ang galit ‘nya on air para wasakin at makaganti para sa kanyang love kuno…….
Well, for whatever it’s worth, Mar’s strategy was effective. At least if he loses in the election he might be able to get himself a career on TV. For sure Korina could pull some strings and make that happen. That’s what pinoys love, right? They would vote for someone they see on TV regardless of the qualifications. I would not be putting my hopes up in the coming election because we Filipinos still have not learned our lesson in picking our leader. The fact that clowns of different colors are running means that they all have a chance of winning and everything will turn into a big joke and sadly, the joke is on us.
I was watching a documentary about Ninoy the other day and I just noticed something about People Power which I have to point out since one of the readers mentioned something about a possible 4th. The first and second one worked only because they were honest and really carried the sentiments of the people. The succeeding ones however, are nothing but a waste of time and nothing more than a travesty to the previous acts because they are just being executed and used by other politicians who have their own agendas. Those politicians have definitely earned their seat- in hell!
wahaha..mar roxas ramdam din kita..ramdam na ramdam kung di ka mananalo..kala mo naman my followers si korina..spell ASA!
nakakatawa talaga yung… “hindi kayo si kim at gerald”. haha!
over acting masyado ang mga patalastas ni mar. pati kinuha nyang talents, halatang halata na hindi nagsasabi ng totoo.
I love your sense of humor!
A lot of people now hated Mar Roxas because he is so overacting. Dapat i-pull out na ang infomercial nya.
Query lang po. Si erap was convicted in the case of plunder. Despite the pardon, is his civil liberty, such as running for a public office, also reinstated? Kase kung di na siya pwedeng mag-run, dapat ipaalam ito sa mga tao para di masayang ang boto at para maging aware ang mga tao na hindi na siya karapat-dapat hindi lamang iboto kung hindi pati na rin kumandidato.
I haven’t checked it myself but my classmate in UP Law said that their consti prof said daw that the bar on running for public office was a mere “whereas” provision, meaning it is not binding.
Gumawa na lang ng Drama Series si Mar kaysa sa mga Ads,Tutal Pan-drama lang ang Mga Public Service ek-ek niya….
The Man with the huge display of good doings wins the top.
Still the most hated candidate here in heckler’s blog has the 5th and 6th place?
Kinda reminds me of Pichay. “Pangarap mo, tutuparin ko.”
(duh like you were running for President!)
Malaki na talaga ang impluwensya ng TV sa mga Pinoy because they average to waste a month of their year sitting in front of the TV like a Couch potato.
Drop Korina, your surveys may rise
‘haven’t we done enough’?
if you want to get even with villar, gawa din kayo
ng infomercial, yung katulad ng kay villar style,
question and answer portion and get the services
of kris, siempre ang topic ay kung papaano pati
ang gobierno ay hindi nya pinalampas sa kanyang
pagka negosyante at pinagkikitaan pa…
at kailangan every now and then ito ipalabas, kumbaga,
‘isaksak sa baga’ ng mga manunuod, now, this is
expensive, pero ‘di ba, madrigal is old rich?
Currently, the Philippine Republic President is receiving Php60,000.00 (about USD1,333.33 at Php45.00 to 1 USD exchange rate) monthly – wikipedia
Eto po yung pinag uunahan nila Villar, Roxas, Erap, etc, etc, etc…. at yan din lang po ang sweldo ni pandak. Ano kaya ang mabibili ko sa 60k per month at willing akong magbayad ng milyon para sa isang tv ad? hhmmm…..
more than anything else, it is the power that everybody
is eyeing for
Ang pangit anoh, what if si Mar is asked to slide down to VP by his party LP to pave way for Noynoy’s candidacy? Wahahah!
Sinugal nya na ang marami nyang pera sa ads, pati mga pedicabs at tsinelas, tapos pati ang pag-ibig at romansa…tapos biglang maging ganun kaya ang sitwasyon? Wahahahhahaha!
Carlo J for Senator?
Controversial director Carlo J. Caparas is reportedly running for senator next year. Asked about his number 1 qualification, he replied, “Mas marami akong alam na English words kaysa kay Lito Lapid.”
I beg to disagree. Mas may dating naman si LL kaysa kay Caparas no?! CHiwee, mavakes! Idefend si idol!
TRUE! TRUE! TRUE! Ay teka Pido ha. Sino nga ulit si Carlo J?
Sana ang amyendahan na batas ay yung hahatulan ng kamatayan ang presidente na napatunayan na nagnakaw at gumawa ng kabulastugan sa kaban ng bayan at hindi yung pagbabawal magsuot ng mp3 player pag nagmamaneho.
Korina is already 45!!! Menopause na pala. Most women are at that age.
Give way to Noynoy Mr. Palengke dahil consistently wala ka sa top 3 survey.
Mahirap paniwalaang makakaya nyúng Iloilo boy na makipaģ–sex kay Gloria Arroyo!
As always Mr.Heckler……
“The problem with political jokes is they get elected.”
Enough said. Lahat sila, ginagawa na lang joke ang pulitika sa bansa.
Si Mar, PWE! Scripted talaga. Talagang tinaon pa ang wedding before the elections. Akala niya siguro lahat NAUUTO NIYA! Kung mabasa niya man to, TABLAN KA! PWE! Pati si Korina, halatang naging gahaman na sa kapangyarihan!
Di’ba kaya siya umalis pansamantala sa pagbabalita eh ayaw niya daw mabahiran ng pulitika. Eh anong ginawa mo ngayon? LUMIPAT KA LANG NG MGA NOONTIME AND PRIMETIME SLOTS! Mas naging suki pa kayo ngayon ng tv.
That’s what we call, POLITICAL TACTICS!
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(clap)(clap)(clap)(clap)(clap)(clap)
THE BEST TALAGA SI MR.HECKLER!
bakit kasi parang assumption na agad na Mar is LP’s standard bearer, when sabi naman ni Kiko he has not been chosen pa democratically by the members of the party?
I love LP. pero sana, if it is the will of all members na si Mar, so be it (lunukin na lang natin ang kalokohan nila ni Korina). But if the majority of LP wants someone else, like the son of Ninoy and Cory, they should follow suit as well.
it’s either masyadong “assuming” si mr. roxas that he will be the party’s standard bearer, o matagal na talaga siyang gino-groom ng party to be one. kaso kulang siya sa karisma. he doesnt look and sound sincere. di niya mahanap kiliti ng masa. (for sure kiliti ni korina nahanap na niya hihi)
as for noynoy for the presidency, let Dumbledore do the talking, “only someone who wants to find the Philosopher’s Stone but not use it (for selfish reasons, i guess) can get it.”
thing is, i believe the idea that Noy will be a president that embodies the benevolence and integrity of his mother, if not the political genius of Ninoy. and i do want Noynoy to finally take Malacanang and give the nation a break from the kind of presidency that the country is forced to endure under the current administration.
my only problem is this: i am not sure if the country’s political and (election) nature deserves a Noynoy. i am afraid to thrust Noynoy to fulfill his destiny via a political landscape like ours. too dirty. too shamelessly patronizing. too corrupt. he is above that. his parents’ legacy is above that. he is too precious to be thrust in that jungle.
but on second thought, Cory rose from the ugly rubbles of Martial Law. maybe the same can be said for Cory’s son.
when i read the opinion columns a few days ago… some of them were saying that noynoy has a good chance of winning because of the “cory magic”.
considering the other presidential wannabees i would probably pick
him
but it seems that he is quite reluctant to run for the presidency…
at the end of the day it would be nice to vote for someone who really wants the job because he/she genuinely wants to make a difference in our lives.
Mar or Noynoy will do just fine. It’s just that Noynoy has bigger chances because of his background coming from parents who were both heroes and highly respected in the country.
Ewwww. Si Trying hard (mar) at si hardly Trying (noynoy). Either way talo ang bayan sa parehong oligarch
i think for all the flak mar is getting because of his cheesy politicking, we still cannot ignore his credentials and capabilities. he IS very qualified for the job. i’m just not to keen on seeing korina as first lady, but what can you do. can’t win them all! between noynoy and mar though, i’d pick noynoy. but say, among teodoro, mar and noynoy, i’d go for teodoro but i doubt he can win in these elections. maybe in 2016.
Over namang mang–alipusta ang ilan dito! Menopause na si Korina…. …Baket, si Mar ba… tinitigasan pa?
Galing mo rin bumanat Kandong KANTANOD! bagay syo name mo
Yáng mga nangangampanya para isulong ang kandidatura ni Noynoy, ang sadyang pakana ay buwagin ang Korina–Mar love team. Gusto nilang umurong sa kasal si Korina! Maiitim ang budhi!
Yáng mga nangangampanya para isulsol ang kandidatura ni Noynoy, ang sadyang pakana ay buwagin ang Korina–Mar love team. Tukoy nilang pagiging First Lady ang mahal ni Korina. Gusto nilang siya’y umurong sa kasal! Maiitim ang budhi!
because of his parents, noynoy will win, no doubt,
but at the end of the day, will noynoy find self
fulfillment?